The Ranch House
by Rachel Lyse Brook
Summary: A set of Sequels to my two previous Avengers one shots: exploring the life of Steve and Natalia after the War of the Infinity Gems. In Chapter 10: Lieutenant is a sneaky stallion, and Steve decides to take a risk. Rated T for Language! I own nothing! Listed as complete as these are one shots. Cover by Renee. Only I have permission to use.
1. Chapter 1

A/N: Hello Again, Avenger Fans!

So...Apparently, the creative ball is still rolling for this little Post-Infinity War probably-wrong-speculation-of-mine story. So, I'm putting these other one shots into a series called **The Ranch House**. (You'll see why in a bit.)

These'll just be little snippets of Steve and Natalia's lives after Run Away (with you) and It Don't Hurt (Like it used to). I recommend reading those first, seeing as this'll be sequels to them!

Anyway, on to this particular one shot!

Note: This was inspired by Carrie Underwood's "What I never Knew I always wanted". However, it doesn't follow the song, at all. It's a great song! Feel free to listen to it while reading!

Also note: In doing some research on Steve, I found that in the Main universe of Marvel Comics (Earth-616) Steve is Roman Catholic and was raised that way by his mother in the 1920's. While this hasn't been confirmed in the MCU, it has been stated that he is Christian (though not what denomination). So, I took the liberty of adding this aspect to his character. It adds a dimension to his character that I would like to explore a bit.

Warning(ish): Nat and Steve have a very personal conversation about a particular view that people may not share in this chapter. Nothing explicit or anything, just personal.

* * *

 **Never Knew I Always Wanted**

 _January (Four months after the end of the War of the Infinity Gems)_

Steve Rogers' eyes snapped open abruptly, his crystal blue eyes staring into the darkness that surrounded him, adjusting to the lack of light after a few blinks. He searched around the small room, looking for what it was that had disturbed his rest, his left hand going towards where he would have kept his shield…back when he was an Avenger.

His eyes caught two sources of light, one being the red glow from his alarm clock which flashed 03:04, and the second being a small night light that he had insisted on installing outside his room.

Taking a steadying breath, his eyes caught sight of the cause of the sound that had awoken him.

A figure standing in his door way. A very familiar, thin, but deceptively built, figure, with hair that framed her shadowed face and brushed her shoulders.

He relaxed his shoulders as he slowly turned to face the figure. "Nat?" He asked, his voice soft with sleep.

Natalia didn't respond, but she did enter his room, slowly, as if afraid that she would set off some kind of trap.

And Steve couldn't blame her for that.

The two retired Avengers had lived hard lives out in the world. Fighting extraterrestrials, would-be-king gods, a mad titan, chasing HYDRA, defending citizens, and so much more. Being a little cautious (read: paranoid) came with the territory.

Unfortunately.

She sat down carefully on the edge of his bed. He didn't reach for her, not wishing to scare her. The Super Soldier had grown (sadly) used to these little visits in the middle of the night.

(He would say sadly in that it happened more often than they cared to admit.)

He waited for her to speak.

It didn't take long. "Can I stay?" Her voice was so soft and broken that it reminded Steve of an injured kitten he had found as a child mewing behind a trash can in an alley in Brooklyn.

And how could he deny either of them?

He shifted slightly, lifting the covers, knowing that she would crawl under them even if he didn't lift them.

Once she was settled under the duvet, he adjusted his position in the full size bed so that they were facing each other with several inches separating the two of them. He rested a hand gently between them, a silent sign that he was there, that she was safe, and that, if she wanted to talk, he would listen.

Natalia was silent for a long while, and Steve watched her face in the faint light with kind eyes. If she decided to just go to sleep, he would too.

But tonight didn't appear to be one of those nights.

A shaking and cold hand rested atop his and his fingers curled around hers, gingerly, as she spoke.

"I was in the Red Room," Her voice soft yet thick with emotion. "I had made it to those final tests…I…I didn't want to pass, Steve. I-I fought so h-h-hard." Her voice broke and he could hear the sobs coming.

He moved slowly closer to her, his arm moving from her hand to her shoulder and finally her waist before drawing her close to him. She offered no resistance to his touch and leaned into his chest, her hands coming up to grip the front of his t-shirt. One of his hands rubbed soothing circles on her back, while the other slipped into her curly locks.

"I didn't want to graduate," She cried out, her fingers digging fiercely into the cotton of his shirt, as if to prevent herself from losing him like she had lost that piece of herself all those years ago. "I-I di-didn't-" Her voice shattered and the sobs that she had been holding back fell harshly from her lips.

Back when she had been the Black Widow, Steve had only seen her shed tears on a handful of occasions, and all of those where when the mission called for it. But ever since they had left that life behind and settled on this little ranch not far from the Barton's farm, these emotional moments had come frequently and with a vengeance.

And Steve would be lying if he said he didn't understand why.

Natalia, under the guise of Natasha, had held it in for so long, been the Widow for decades, and all the monsters of her past had never been fully dealt with. She had never mourned the loss of her parents, her friends, her childhood, and especially her womanhood.

He wasn't sure how long she cried for, but his grip on her never lessened, grounding her in reality and comfort as she wept. Eventually, the tears turned into hiccups and then to soft breaths on his now wet shirt. Her fingers slowly loosened as she fell into a slumber. He wasn't sure if it was peaceful or restful, but at least she was getting some rest.

Steve gently kissed her forehead and let his own tears fall, weeping silently for the things she never knew she had wanted until they had been taken from her.

* * *

 _March_

"Don't give me that look, Steve." Natalia said with a genuinely teasing smile on her face as they cleaned off the table after a delicious breakfast. "I think it's a fairly reasonable proposition since we usually find our way into each other's beds every night."

"You know I can't agree with that, Nat." He said softly, turning on the water to wash the dishes. "It's the reason why I made sure this house had three bedrooms before we moved in. Seeking out solace from each other is one thing, residing permanently in the same room…that's another."

Natalia gnashed her teeth against her lower lip, holding back a retort. They had had this conversation several times in the six months since they moved in, and it always ended at this point. And, to be fair, Steve did have a reasonable argument.

Sharing a bedroom, and even a bed, with a woman was something incredibly uncomfortable for Steve. She knew he had been raised in an Irish Catholic household and that, even though time had changed the morality of the world, his had not. So firm was his moral compass that he couldn't be swayed.

In one argument about this very topic, she had pushed too far and he had cracked, revealing a deeper meaning as to why he didn't want to share a bed with her.

" _I can't do that because the one woman I want to sleep permanently beside would be the one I say 'I do' to, for better or worse, richer or poorer, till death do us part. And even then, I'd sleep beside her six feet under because that's how it was always intended to be."_

Needless to say, that had stung her right to the core. And not entirely in a bad way.

It opened her eyes more to the man that was Steve Rogers.

It explained (at least a bit of) why he hadn't really been interested in the dozens of girls she had pushed him towards during their time as partners, or his devotion to Margaret Carter when she was alive, or how awkward he had been with her niece, Sharon.

He was looking for someone who would stay with him until his dying breath.

And it showed just how different their compasses were.

To her, a bed was just a bed. A place to rest your head. It didn't matter who else resided in it or what was done in it.

But to Steve it was something intimate and personal. A place of comfort and life bringing that was so radically different. It was where fears were faced, where dreams were made, and where spouses gave themselves to each other.

It explained why, when she woke up in the morning after making her way into his bed at night, she would find him sleeping on the couch in the living room just beyond his room.

"Alright," She conceded, finally, knowing that she wasn't going to win this, unless…

 _Not going there._ She thought as she pulled on her jacket.

He smiled, gently, as he dried off his hands and walked towards her. He placed a kiss on the crown of her head. "Thank you for understanding, Natalia. It means a lot to me."

In years past, she would have stopped the blush that crawled up her cheeks as Steve said her name. But this was a new start, a new Natalia, and she let herself blush.

Granted, she would blame it on the chilly March weather if he asked.

"You're welcome," she said, passing him his favorite flannel jacket. (That was one thing he really loved about living out here, he got to wear his "old man" clothes more often.) "Oh, by the way, Clint wanted me to ask you to come over because he needs your help chopping wood today."

The former soldier rolled his eyes as he slipped the jacket onto his back. "I bet just to see that he doesn't have to complete the chore himself."

Natalia laughed as they stepped out on the piece land that was the Ranch they never knew they always wanted.

* * *

A/N: And that's a wrap for this one!

Please let me know what you thought. Did you love it/hate it?

As soon as the next part is ready, I'll put it up.

Thanks again!

~Rachel


	2. Chapter 2

A/N: Hi guys!

Thanks for all the favorites/follows. I really appreciate it!

Just a recap: these stories are little snippets of the life of Steve and Natalia post my version of the end of Infinity War. Each chapter might not follow immediately after the one prior, but I will try to go in chronological order.

Note: I don't own a thing.

This one-shot was inspired a bit by Andrea Bocelli's Rendition Can't Help Falling in Love with You.

Features Laura and Clint. Hopefully no one is OOC.

Enjoy!

* * *

 **Only Fools Rush In**

 _November. One year after coming to the Ranch House_

"So," Clint Barton began as he swung his ax hard into the log before him. "When are you and Nat gonna stop dancing around the obvious?"

Steve didn't meet the other man's gaze as he swung his own axe, breaking his own log into multiple pieces. "What do you mean?" He asked, placing the next log on the chopping stump.

"The fact that you look at her like a lovesick puppy and she's been sneaking glances at you since before the two of you came out here."

The former soldier paused mid swing at the second part of his friend's statement and turned a surprised look at the archer. "Wh-what?"

Clint chuckled and rolled his eyes. "Really, Cap? Are you that bad at reading your partner?"

Steve lowered his ax, looking genuinely confused. "I don't know what you are talking about."

"Bull." The archer said, swinging hard at the next log, cutting it cleanly. He rubbed his arm over his forehead for a moment, looking over at the confused young/old man. "Seriously, Cap, it's been a year since you brought Nat out here. You live on a ranch with her out in the middle of nowhere and expect me to believe that friendship is the only thing that spurred on this little adventure?"

 _No._ The former captain thought to himself.

He knows that he glances at Natalia with more-than-just-friends adoration. He'd be lying if he wasn't attracted to his friend. But…

"So, why all the waiting? Why not just tell her what's going on in your head?"

Sighing, Steve put down the ax and ran a hand through his longer-than-regulations hair. "I don't know." The words rolled of his tongue in a whisper. "I guess I-I don't want to…mess this up? I mean…after everything that's happened, not just with me, but with Natalia too…I just don't…" He trailed off, his blue eyes misting slightly in the cold.

A calloused hand rested on Steve's shoulder, and Clint's blue eyes meeting his own.

"This isn't 1945, Steve." The man said in a tone similar to the one he used with his children. "You don't go on missions anymore. Nat isn't Peggy and considering she's stayed this long out here, I don't think she's going anywhere."

The former soldier swallowed thickly. "But…" He continued, softly, as if afraid of his own voice reaching his ears. "What if all of this isn't what she wants?" _What if I'm not what she wants?_

Clint gave the other man a soft smile. Ever the Captain, putting his team before himself at every turn, even when it came to his own happiness. _Nat is one lucky woman._ "You won't know until you ask her." He squeezed the man's shoulder a bit. "And Laura and I will open our doors should things go south and the two of you need space from one another. I'm sure Cooper would love some time with his Uncle Steve."

Steve smiled back, but his blue eyes still looked…frightened. And Clint couldn't really tell if it was because he would be facing the former Black Widow with an unguarded heart (if he chose to) or if he was afraid of his own feelings for the woman. Either one was a reasonable reason for the fear.

The Captain had confided in Clint long ago that he had really struggled with women both before and after the ice. When he and Natasha had been partnered after New York, Steve had come to Clint to ask for advice on the Black Widow.

The irony of how this had all come full circle…

"And, if it helps any, as her honorary brother, I give you full permission to take her on as many dates as she'll let you."

The deer in the headlights look from Steve was more than worth the not-really-a-joke.

* * *

Laura stared at the window she had been cleaning, and then through it as the two men beyond the glass moved. There was already a rather large pile of wood between the super soldier and the archer, enough to last for both households for the rest of the winter, but neither looked like they were stopping.

At least until her husband said something that made Steve pause.

"They talking about anything interesting out there?" A voice cut through her observations.

Looking up, Laura smiled at Natalia who was cleaning the ceiling fan blades. "I'm not sure, but Clint must have said something to get Steve to stop what he's doing mid action."

Nat's eyebrow rose, but she didn't look out the window. "Maybe Barton brought up another remodel he'd like to do, and knowing Steve, he's probably dumbfounded and probably trying to dissuade him for your sake."

"Oh lord…" Laura muttered. "Not again. He's taken apart the whole house twice already!"

Nat chuckled. "He obviously needs a new hobby."

"Indeed he does. Maybe Steve should help him with that. Manly bonding and all that." The housewife replied, looking back out the window, lifting a curious eyebrow of her own at what she saw. Instead of Steve looking like he was trying to dissuade Clint from doing something, he looked almost…nervous. "Well, I think we might be wrong about what they are talking about."

"Oh?" Nat grunted, catching one of the blades from moving out of her reach. "Why is that?"

"Because Steve's playing defense rather than offense."

"Is he moving his left hand or right hand through his hair?"

Laura blinked up at the former spy. "Left."

"Something personal then. Topic he's not willing to talk about or thinks he can't escape from."

Now Laura was incredibly curious. What could have the dear Captain so riled up? "What sort of things would cause him to react like that?"

Natalia jumped down from her step stool and walked over to the housewife, leaning against the window pane. "Off the top of my head, something about either his or anyone else's love life. He's always been particularly bashful about that." She gave an almost knowing smile, as if she was laughing at an inside joke.

"Didn't you say you had tried to set him up with different women when the two of you were partners in S.H.I.E.L.D.?"

The former spy nodded slowly, her smile faltering slightly. "I don't think he ever called any of the girls I pointed him in the direction of. He always said he was too busy." She shrugged slightly. "And granted, I didn't know about Peggy—his best girl from the 40's—until her funeral. If I had known that, I probably would have backed off…but he never said a word about her."

Laura blinked. "Really? Those were his exact words?"

Natalia nodded. "Yeah. And granted, he was busy. Fury kept him busy, though I have a feeling that was because Steve asked to be kept busy. The amount of hours he logged in the years he was with S.H.I.E.L.D. was enormous."

"So, he was busy with someone. He was busy with you."

The former spy's green eyes met the housewife's, questioning before turning to surprise and then rejection of the ideas flashing through the housewife's eyes. "No. No. We are not going there!"

"But it's so obvious, Nat!" The brunette pleaded.

The copper haired woman glared, her green eyes flashing dangerously. "What could be so obvious, Laura? That he's hung up on his dead lover from decades ago and wasn't going to settle for anyone else? I even set him up with her niece, and he never called her. Just because we were on missions together at that time does not mean that it's obvious that he wanted…" She brushed that thought away before she could vocalize it. "Why are we even arguing about this? Steve's an adult, he can make his own choices. We should leave him alone and not meddle." _I've already meddled enough._

The walls were coming up. Laura was losing her, fast. This had never been intended to become an argument. "You don't have to run anymore, Nat."

Natalia froze, the walls freezing as well, as she looked at Laura. _I…I'm running?_ Her hands twisted the rag painfully, a nervous tick that had not gone away.

But Laura was right, she realized as she thought the whole conversation through once more. She was, but maybe not for the reason Laura thought.

Taking a deep breath, she looked back at the other woman. "Back when Steve and I were on the run, right before S.H.I.E.L.D. fell, he said it was hard for him to trust me when he didn't know who I was. I asked him who he wanted me to be, that I would be anything he wanted me to be…and all he wanted was a friend." Her eyes grew misty. "The whole time I was setting him up with girls who might be romantically interested in him, and all he wanted was a friend. He was all alone in the world, Laura."

"He's not anymore," Laura said, reaching out to brush the tears from her friend's eyes. "He has you and he cares very deeply about you. I mean, he dropped his shield to bring you out here so the two of you could heal and start over. I don't think that was by accident." She lifted the other woman's chin, slightly, so they could look each other in the eye. "Maybe it's time to take a leap of faith and just ask."

Natalia smiled slightly. "I thought wise men say that only fools rush in?"

Laura outright laughed. "Nat, with how many years the two of you have been dancing with each other, that's not rushing."

* * *

A/N: And that's a wrap! I have to say, this is not my favorite piece so far...but I have a cute one coming up next! Full of fluff and all that.

Reviews would be very nice.

Thank you again!

~Rachel


	3. Chapter 3

A/N: I'm spoiling you guys.

Thank you again for all the favorites/follows. And LilyRose14, Come'on guys! Listen!

This chapter does have a bit of fluff and a bit of h/c and was inspired by Lava by Disney.

Enjoy.

I don't own anything.

* * *

 **Lava**

 _November, the following Sunday_

"Well," Steve said, throwing and successfully catching a few pieces of popcorn into his mouth as the credits of Frozen rolled across the screen. "Tangled was so much better."

Natalia rolled her eyes. "Fanboy."

"What?" He turned a mock hurt glare at her. "It was! It was truer to the source material, had more flushed out characters, and had stunning animation."

"You've been on Tumblr again, haven't you?" She muttered under her breath. "Frozen had that same animation, Steve."

The bulky man shifted on the small couch to fully face her. "Have you read the Snow Queen? She's not a straight up villain, but she does kidnap a one of the protagonists, who is a child, and encases him in ice. And it's not a story about familial love, the Snow Queen is alone in the end. It's Greda who helps saves Kay. And yes, I'm all for a redeemable villain, but Elsa is not a villain. And maybe they were going for the whole she's like the Beast, but they missed the mark. I will say though, the Hans surprise came out of left field and was pretty well done."

"Well," Natalia began, turning to face him fully. "Tangled didn't follow the source material completely either. For example, the reason why her hair being cut in the fairy tale is because she was pregnant. She was given rather than stolen by the witch, and not because of her magical hair, but because her mother wanted some rapunzel from the witches' garden. Oh, and the prince who saves her wasn't tossed from the tower and forced to wander the Earth blind until Rapunzel found him."

Steve nodded, conceding those points. "True, however, Tangled filled those gaps with a unique story of its own, one of self-discovery that didn't involve shutting everyone else out."

"Sometimes the world can't help you with your problems."

"And sometimes bottling it up only makes the explosion worse. People get hurt."

"I can see we are at an impasse…" Nat sighed, resting her head on the back of the couch. "Agree to disagree?"

"Deal." His eyes sparkled as a smile grew across his face. "Oh! Lila had said there was a-a…" he snapped his fingers as if trying to remember just what the young Barton girl had said. "Disney short—that's it—that she said I should check out. She said it was adorable."

Nat rolled her green eyes. "Everything is adorable at her age." She passed the Netflix remote to him. "Alright, Uncle Stevie, go ahead and find this short. I'm gonna grab a drink. Want anything?"

"Some water, please?" He watched her as she stood and took his glass from the small table in front of the couch. "Thanks, Nat!"

As she vanished into the kitchen, he searched for the search bar. Once he found it, he triumphantly typed in four letters: LAVA. He had gotten, slowly, more used to technology, though he was very happy that most of the stuff he dealt with now was not Stark tech. The stuff never made any sense…

But anyway, back to the task at hand. He hit the search button and smiled when he saw the image of what he was pretty sure Lila had said was this particular Disney Short.

Pressing the okay button, he selected the video just as Nat returned from the kitchen. Leaning back into the couch, he threw his arm over the back while a soft ukulele began to play over the speakers.

The two watched in silence as the story of a lonely volcano began.

And Steve really couldn't help the pull at his heart as he related to the old volcano. He had been alone, before and after the serum, in the ice, and even among the Avengers. _After all, no one is ever interested in dancing with a guy they might step on…_

His thoughts were pulled as a female voice filled his ears and his eyes locked on the screen as he watched the now not so lonely volcanos sing in perfect harmony.

" _I lava you…"_

And the short faded to black.

Neither of the former Avengers said anything for a long moment, and Steve wished Natalia would say something, _anything_ , to pull him from the drowning he was experiencing in his chest, if only to stop the tears that flooded his eyes.

But the inevitable caught up with him and he was no longer able to hold in his inner agony, and a ragged breath escaped his lips. Nat's head moved so quickly, he was sure he heard the pop of her neck, her green eyes meeting his swimming blue ones. Her expression softened as she wrapped her arms around his middle.

Steve's arms moved automatically around her, he had grown so used to it that he no longer hesitated, and buried his nose in her hair as the tears finally fell.

* * *

 _The next morning_

The sun rose uninterrupted by the sounds of sleep that filled the room of Natalia Romanova, unafraid to wake the former Black Widow as its gentle beams graced the bed that she slept on, eventually reaching her face. She frowned, stubbornly wishing to stay asleep just five more minutes.

But the sun does not have a snooze button.

Taking a deep, irritated breath, she inhaled the scent of the sheets below her, confirming that she was indeed in her own bed, an odd—and slightly disappointing—occurrence. Even if Steve wouldn't sleep in the same room as her on nights where they didn't suffer from nightmares, it was just weird to not wake up to the smell so unique to him clinging to the sheets.

Rubbing her eyes, a song floated into her head, and she was too drowsy to care what it was, though it did help that it was a gentle song with a ukulele. It brought a sad smile to her lips once she realized what it was, and brought back the night before. She sat up and decided she should probably check up on Steve, who had no doubt carried her up the stairs to her room after she fell asleep during their movie marathon.

After watching the little short Lava, Natalia had resolved to make Steve laugh before the night was done. And smiled a bit more at the memory that she had succeeded as they finished watching Monty Python and the Holy Grail.

Running her fingers through her hair, trying to get the wild red bed head under control, she made her way downstairs, humming to the ukulele. Twirling in step with the song at the bottom of the stairs, she turned into the kitchen…

And right into Steve's chest.

His warm hands, which had thankfully not been carrying anything, shot out and steadied her waist as she looked up, still humming. Without missing a beat, she moved her hands to clasp behind Steve's neck, forcing the two of them into a semi-slow dance motion as she continued to sway to the refrain she hummed.

Although her eyes were closed, she was pretty sure that her partners was bright pink in the face. Too bad she didn't have her phone handy.

The humming eventually turned into words as she remembered what the final refrain said. It was sung softly, and without confidence, because she had only heard the song once, but she didn't care. It was a cute song and this was a cute moment.

" _I lava you…"_ She sung as the ukulele stopped playing in her head.

She could feel Steve relax as they stopped dancing, moving his head a bit, so that his nose as very close to her ear. "You know…I thought the guy was supposed to ask the lady to dance?"

Natalia chuckled, glad that his voice sounded normal, and a bit playful. "Well, you should be a bit quicker, next time, eh soldier?"

His chuckle reverberated in her chest. "I guess I will, ma'am."

She pulled away, smirking up at him. "Did you make coffee?"

Before he could open his mouth, the coffee maker began to drip the brown liquid into the pot below. Impulsively, Nat stood on her tippy toes and kissed Steve's warm cheek.

"You are a God-send."

"Uh…You're welcome?"

* * *

A/N: And that's a wrap for this one!

Btw: my opinion on Tangled and Frozen is that I prefer the former. Frozen is okay. I'm just not a huge fan.

Also, Lava is the cutest little story. I completely recommend watching it, even if it'll wreck your feels.

Reviews are nice! Until next time!

~Rachel


	4. Chapter 4

A/N: Hello again, Avengers fans!

I'll be brief today.

This chapter is pretty fluffy, if you need a warning for your teeth. And was inspired by Something's There from Beauty and the Beast.

Note: I don't own anything save for the OCs I'm adding in this chapter. They aren't human/alien...so I don't know if that counts?

Enjoy!

* * *

 **Wasn't There Before**

 _April (a year and a half after the Infinity Stones War)_

Steve took a step back, paint roller gripped in his hands, and smiled at his handiwork.

It had taken a year, but seeing the fruits of his labor completed before him, it was worth every setback, every snowstorm, every alteration to satisfy safety regulations, every little stumbling block.

The barn was finally done.

The elderly couple who owned the Ranch before Steve and Natalia came along had not been able to maintain the old barn, and it had fell rapidly into disrepair. Steve had taken one look at the pathetic looking building, and fell hard for it, and almost immediately consulted with Clint on how to best go about with restoring the old building, and now it looked just like new.

Maybe like it had when it had first been built.

Picking up his paint supplies, he put his stuff away and headed into the Ranch House. Time to get cleaned up and pick something up.

Today was a day to celebrate, and he knew who he wanted to show his project to first.

* * *

"Well, this is quite a domestic sight."

Natalia turned to face the voice, a knife—which she had been using to cut the fresh tomato Laura had given her from the Barton garden—still gripped firmly in her hand.

And she wondered, not for the first time, if her roommate/friend/partner/whatever-the-hell-he-is had a death wish. She eyed the man with a raised eyebrow, noting firstly that he was very relaxed, leaning against the doorframe of the door to the kitchen, one hand hidden in the hall while his right hand was smoothing back his hair (a gesture she noted could mean a lot of different things). Secondly, that he had not removed his shoes, but had changed his clothes from the ones he had been wearing that morning.

All of that in combination was taken as a sign that he was finished for the day.

He, too, lifted an eyebrow in jest. "Is the Widow going soft?"

She stuck her tongue out at his teasing. "No. Just hungry. You interrupted my making myself a sandwich. Don't expect me to share." He laughed at that. "You know what they say about hungry Black Widows…"

Steve stood from the doorway, revealing his left hand. "Well, then I'm glad I brought something with me."

She took a look at the plastic container he held out to her, noting that there was something within it. Upon closer inspection, she noted that it wasn't just anything. It was full of pastries, specifically Zefir.(1)

"You did not!" She exclaimed with false irritation, her eyes narrowing suspiciously. "Are you trying to butter me up, Rogers?"

He shrugged his shoulders, neither confirming nor denying if he was.

Natalia put down the knife and crossed the kitchen. "What did you do?"

"What?" Steve said, his expression full of mock hurt. "I can't do something nice for you without an ulterior motive?"

She rolled her eyes, enjoying this banter way too much. "Alright then. What's the occasion?"

"The…" he began, but stopped, a wide grin spreading over his face. "Actually, it'll just be easier to show you." He quickly put down the box of zefir and took her hand, pulling her out of the house.

Chuckling at his enthusiasm, she allowed herself to be dragged out of the house, her slipper covered feet falling softly on the grass covered earth.

"Close your eyes." He said, grasping both of her hands and facing her as he pulled her across the yard. "No peeking."

Sighing, Natalia decided to indulge him, just this once. He had brought her zefir after all...

She counted the steps, more out of habit than actually needing to know, and determined that they had made it to the back yard. After a few more moments, Steve stopped and let go of her hands.

"Okay, you can open your eyes now."

Natalia didn't need to be told twice. Her green eyes snapped open and widened at the sight before her.

"You finished it!" She squealed, looking back at her companion who was grinning like _she_ had given _him_ a surprise.

"Yep. I finished the last coat of paint this morning."

She turned back to the finished red barn. She knew that Steve had been working very long and very hard on restoring the structure to its former glory, but hadn't been able to assist him in the endeavor while she had been helping Laura by babysitting Nathaniel while the housewife was helping her older children with getting them to school and whatever other activities they had.

Plus, Steve needed something to occupy his time that didn't involve thinking about old wounds and problems.

And the barn looked magnificent. It was painted in the classic red and white (of course, this is Steve we are talking about), with a five pointed roof and sliding wooden doors. It was as if the plans he had shown her months ago had leapt into reality.

"Want the grand tour?" Steve said, drawing her eyes away from the barn for a moment.

She almost nodded enthusiastically, but she remembered that she wasn't wearing suitable shoes…and that all her shoes were upstairs in her room. "I'd love too, but…I should probably put on some real shoes first …"

Steve seemed to consider that for a moment, but a light bulb went off. "No need. I can carry you around."

She lifted an eyebrow, a playful warning.

"Piggyback?" He added, as if hoping to escape her ire.

He was so eager to show her his handiwork and, him being Steve, she knew he wouldn't try any funny business. She trusted him. And he looked just so pleased with himself that it melted her heart.

Just a bit.

 _Eh…what the hell?_

"Alright, Steve." She finally conceded. "Just quit with the puppy eyes."

"Yes, ma'am." He said (in that charming way that would make any woman swoon…wait… _what?_ ), turned his back to her, and held out his arms to catch her legs.

She hopped onto his back, her arms wrapping around his broad shoulders and her legs around his middle. His hands gripped the under part of her knees, keeping her secure on his back. "Alright. Mush! Or whatever it is that gets you to move."

He laughed, throwing his head back in a fake rearing motion, and neighing like a horse before moving forward.

 _He's such a dork._

After opening the doors to the barn, the pair entered the space. And the first thing Natalia noticed was that if the outside was an impressive transformation, the inside was miraculous.

She had been in this barn back when they had first purchased this place. The outside had been falling apart, but the inside was pretty much filled with rusted junk that wasn't worth saving. Now, it looked like it could be inhabited. Like something could or should live here.

The space was organized into two floors. The second floor was a loft designed for storing supplies or grains, and the bottom was divided into a long hallway with four stalls splitting off from it. Two on the left, two on the right.

As Steve showed Natalia the stalls, she couldn't help but touch the smooth wood and see the care, time, and dedication that he had put into his craft.

"What are the stalls for?" She asked, finally. "You wouldn't put so much time and energy into each one if you didn't intend them to be used."

"Well…about that." He began, slowly, cautiously. "Remember that article we found in the paper a month or so ago? The one about the three horses in need of a good home?"

"Yes?" Natalia said, her voice cautious, but willing to hear him out.

"Well, I did a little research," He continued, adjusting her on his back a bit. "And turns out that those horse were owned by the couple that lived here before us and are being cared for by their great nephew."

She lifted an eyebrow. "Is that so?"

"Yeah," He said, shrugging his shoulders a bit. "And I thought…maybe…it would be nice for them to…come home."

His voice became softer and softer as he spoke, but she was still able to pick up all he had said. And she mulled it around in her mind for a bit. Honestly, Natalia didn't know the first thing about taking care of an animal, much less a horse. However, she had seen the mass of books that he had acquired over the past several months and it hadn't been hard to guess that he was eventually going to bring this up.

But three animals would be a lot of work and money and time…

 _But what else are we working on now? I mean, Steve is finished with rebuilding the barn and we do have money to spare…and if we ever need more, we can always get a job in town…_

"You really thought this through, huh?" She finally asked.

"Well," He replied, turning his head a bit to look at her. "I have a full plan written in my room. It details the budget, a care plan, etc."

She couldn't fight the smile that crept up her lips. Leave it to Steve to be the man with a plan. "Well, I guess I need to study up. Have you ever worked with horses?"

Steve froze, as if processing her words. "Really?! You're up for this?"

She didn't bother holding back a chuckle. "You could use a hobby that doesn't involve taking apart stuff. Clint is already trouble enough."

His laugh rang through the empty barn. "Yeah, he needs a new hobby." He shook his head, as if he couldn't believe what he had heard. "And, yes, I have worked with horses. Back in the thirties. It was the first job I had, though I was mainly brushing and feeding them. I've studied up on the best ways to care for horses."

Natalia blinked. He never talked about his life before the serum, and very little about that information was available in his file. She tucked this precious bit of information in the back of her mind. "Great!" She rested her head on his shoulder. "I guess we should head back and look over those plans."

* * *

 _June_

The months trickled by, full of paperwork, classes, inspections, visits, payments, and waiting on approvals.

Until the day finally arrived with the three horses would be coming home.

Laura and Clint were out for a meeting with Cooper and Lila's new teachers for the upcoming year and wouldn't be home until later that afternoon. So Nathaniel was left in Steve and Natalia's care.

The young brunette was playing with his "Auntie Nat" when Steve's phone buzzed. Natalia did notice the sparkle in his eyes as he pulled out his phone and left the room to take the call. She could only guess that it was Nick, the great-nephew who took care of his family's horses.

Before she could think more about it, Nate attracted her attention once more as he pulled on her sleeve. She looked down to see a toy he was holding up to her, his big, blue eyes staring at her.

"For me?" She asked with surprise as she looked at the toy truck, his favorite red one.

The little boy smiled, showing off his little pearls of teeth. "Cha, Auntie Nat!"

"Well," She said, taking the toy carefully in her hands and patted his head. "Thank you very much, Nathaniel."

He giggled and turned back to his other toy trucks that surrounded him. She joined him, making truck sounds as she pushed the toy around the floor beside him.

A few minutes there, Steve returned to the living room, pocketing his phone. "They are right up the road." He said, answering the question Natalia hadn't had a chance to ask. "I'm gonna wait on the porch."

Natalia nodded and turned to the little boy in her charge. "Guess who is almost here?"

The little boy blinked up at her, eyes full of curiosity. "Who?"

She paused for effect, only making him more excited. "The….Horses!"

"Yay!" Nate dropped his toy trucks and clapped. "Horse-y! Horse-y!"

"Wanna go out and see them, Ace?" Steve asked, kneeling down on the other side of the boy. Nathaniel nodded eagerly and the older man smiled. "Okay. But first we gotta put on our boots!"

Nate squealed in delight as Steve slipped on the boy's favorite birthday present – a pair of cowboy boots – over his feet. Once they were secure, he stood and took his aunt's hand as they walked to the front door.

"We gotta stay on the porch, okay, Nathaniel." Natalia said, her voice clear, serious and patient. "Let Uncle Steve show you the horses."

"Okay, Auntie Nat." The little boy said as she picked him up.

As she did so, a truck and trailer pulled up the path. Steve walked down the porch steps and right to the truck as the driver stepped out. The newcomer was smaller than Steve, but built like a football player. Broad at the shoulders and big boned. His dark hair shifted in the June wind, making him look much younger than he really was.

The man, Nick, shook Steve's hand before heading back to the trailer, making friendly conversation with the soldier as he opened the back. If Natalia had to guess, it was about the college that he attend the next month.

They had been lucky to approach Nick when they had back in April. The young man was at the end of his rope looking for someone to take his great aunt and uncle's horses before he went to college. He had not been sure if he would have been able to attend school this coming year if he hadn't found someone to take the horses in, since he only had enough money to go to school or take care of them. Not both.

So when Steve, who had the experience and the desire to take in these horses, showed up on his doorstep, Nick had been ecstatic. He knew they would be well care for, especially after all the inspections and interviews.

Steve soon led out a chestnut mare from the trailer. The female horse had a mild temperament and was genuinely patient as the former soldier led her in front of the house.

Seeing the mare once more brought memories to Natalia of the day she met the mare. She had instantly fallen for the sweet tempered female Budyonny and had spoken with her in Russian. The horse, as if hearing her native language, had turned towards Natalia and accepted her presence without a care in the world.

Unfortunately, she hadn't been able to name the Budyonny, seeing as part of the agreement that she had made with Steve was that she would name his horse and in return, he would name hers.

"I think that Tatiana knows exactly where she is," Steve laughed as the horse pranced a bit.

Natalia rolled her eyes a bit at the name. When he had first told her the name he'd selected for the chestnut, it had been a riot. Of course he had picked one of the most common Russian girl names. "Of course she does!" She called back in English before switching to Russian. "Добро пожаловать домой, Татьяна."(2)

The mare's head turned towards the native tongue and Steve laughed again. "She'll only respond to Russian by the end of the month if you keep that up!"

"That's the point!" She called back in English. "Didn't you get the memo?"

He continued to laugh as he led the mare away to the barn.

By this time, Nick had come out of the trailer leading a large, black American Warmblood stallion. Even from a distance, Natalia could tell that the poor horse was nervous, but she understood why.

The stallion, whom she had named Lieutenant, did not enjoy trailers. But, at least he was calmer than he might have been if Tatiana hadn't been in the trailer with him.

That had been another reason why Steve and Natalia had agreed to take the three horses together. On their first visit with the horses, they had seen the dynamic between the mare and the stallion, knowing that it would be near-cruelty to take one from the other. They were so attached to each other.

 _Kinda like you and Steve._

The voice in the back of her head vanished as quickly as it came, as her thoughts were pulled from the stallion by her nephew.

"What's that one's name, Auntie Nat?"

Natalia smiled at the boy, then back at the stallion. "That's Lieutenant."

"Loo-ten-ant?" The boy asked, pronouncing each syllable carefully.

"Yes. He's your Uncle Steve's horse."

"Oh…" Nathaniel said, looking back at the horse for a bit before speaking again. "Auntie Nat?"

"Yes, Nathaniel?"

"Why is the black one called Loo-ten-ant?"

"Well," Natalia began, shifting the boy in her arms so she could get a good look at him. "You know that Uncle Steve is a soldier, right?"

Nate nodded. "A Cap-tan?"

"Yes, very good. And all good Captains need their teammates. That's what Lieutenant is."

"Ohhhhh!" The little boy repeated, his blue eyes wide in awe. "Auntie Nat, you are so smart."

"And don't you forget it." Steve said, suddenly, and his pointer finger poked the boy's nose, causing him to giggle. "Tatiana's all set up and enjoying her stall. I'm going to get Colt."

Natalia nodded, her lips twitching at the placement name. Unfortunately, the older couple who had owned these horses before their great nephew took them in had had many horses. Some of which, the names they couldn't recall. All three of these horses had been dubbed with "placement" names, and while Steve and Natalia had found permanent names for the mare and stallion, a new name for the colt had been hard to come by.

"Ok. Just be sure to bring him around. I think Nathaniel can help us with the name problem."

The little boy blinked up at his aunt. "What problem?"

Steve smiled and turned to the boy. "We're gonna need your help, Nate. Think you are up for it?"

The boy nodded eagerly.

"Great! We've got one more horse, and Auntie Nat and I aren't quite sure what his name should be. Think you can help us?"

Another enthusiastic nod from the boy sealed the deal.

"Yay!" Steve cheered. "I'll be right back, okay? Don't go anywhere."

Nathaniel clung to his aunt, as if his excitement alone would prevent her from moving.

Steve vanished into the trailer, and after several long moments reemerged with a young dunalino coated Quarter horse. The majority of the horse's body was white, save for his face and legs, which had a light yellow colored coat.

Nathaniel squealed on sight of the colt. "Auntie Nat, look!" He pointed at the horse's legs. "It has _boots_ like me!"

Natalia laughed at the exclamation. It was true. The color variation on the Quarter Horse made it look like he had yellowish colored boots on. "Good eye, Nathaniel. He is wearing boots."

"Boots!" The boy exclaimed, waving his arm as if to greet the colt and clapped with the horse turned to face him, as if responding to a name.

Steve and Natalia couldn't help but laugh.

"I guess that ends the search for a name." Steve said, running a hand over the colt's muzzle. "Welcome home, Boots."

* * *

A/N: Ok a few things!

(1) Zefir - a Russian pastry that's name literally translates to Air. It is sweet and delicious.

(2) "Welcome home, Tatiana."

I'm assuming in this that Nathaniel is probably around 4-5 years old.

And lastly, Thanks for reading. If you like, please leave a review. Thanks again!

~Rachel


	5. Chapter 5

A/N: Hello again, friends!

So...I've returned to the angst department...for several chapters.

This chapter is not a stand alone. There will be three follow ups to this one.

Also, chapter inspired by Burning House by Cam. Sad and beautiful song. Go listen to it.

I own nothing. Except the horses, they are mine.

* * *

 **Burning House**

 _October, Two years after the Infinity Stones War_

The signs of a storm had been there all day.

The air was moist and thick. The winds were moving at decent speeds. The sky took on a slight grayish color as clouds formed overhead as the day continued.

Steve and Natalia didn't worry about it, though. They had lived through several thunderstorms out here, and were getting good at reading the three horses' behaviors before a storm.

But today seemed a bit different.

The usually calm Tatiana was twitching as her mistress brushed her down, her ears flicking back and forth rapidly.

"Что это, девушка?"(1) Natalia asked the chestnut Budyonny, her tone soothing, placing a comforting hand on the star on the horse's face.

Tatiana huffed slightly.

"I think," Steve, who was putting fresh straw in the Budyonny's stall, spoke up. "Clint said something about a storm rolling in tonight."

"Ah." Natalia replied, before turning back to her horse. "Это нормально, Татьяна.(2) We should let Tatiana and Boots outside tonight."

"Since she's skittish now," The former soldier replied. "That would be a good idea. And it would probably be best to keep Lieutenant in the barn."

One of the things they had noticed right away about the black warmblood was that he didn't like loud noises, and that this dislike was only compounded when he was in an open space for very long periods of time. Rides could be hard with the stallion, until he was fitted with blinders on his halter, as if he preferred to not see all that was around him when he was outside. Tatiana, however, seemed to be the opposite, preferring to be out in the open when it was loud. Boots seemed to have picked up on the mare's behavior and, not wanting to be left out, would usually stay with her.

Not that the young dunalino disliked the stallion or vice versa. Quite the opposite as they would eat together and the colt would follow the stallion's lead if Lieutenant, Tatiana and Boots were all out in the field. He was just very attached to the mare who had adopted him as her own colt.

Steve stepped out of Tatiana's stall, pulling off his gloves and wiping his face with a rag. He took a look at the mare's ears before speaking again. "We should probably turn her loose once you are done. She's not going to want to go back in there."

"My thoughts exactly." She put down the brush and patted the horse's neck. "Давай, милая. Есть некоторые сладкие, мягкая трава, ждет вас."(3)

Steve smiled as the red haired woman lead her horse out to the fenced in pasture, musing about how good she was with the equine.

Taking care of the three horses had taken some getting used to, in all honesty. They didn't talk back like their team on the Avengers had, so Natalia and Steve had to learn to speak the equine language. It hadn't been easy and they were by no means experts at it.

But in the six months since they had met the three magnificent beasts, they had learned so much about their temperaments, about what they liked, what they didn't like, etc. And this had, for Steve anyway, been a study in Natalia during this time.

And the change was remarkable.

When she had first met Tatiana, she had been very cautious, as if she didn't want to spook the poor creature. But once she had found that the mare responded to her native tongue, she had fallen in love with the chestnut Budyonny. While her first ridding experience had truly been an odd experience, she had grown to know the rhythm of her horse and now ridding was a breeze.

And Steve also noticed how therapeutic it was for Natalia to be with Tatiana. Her nightmares had not gone away completely, but they had diminished in intensity and frequency. Although he knew very few words in Russian, he was certain that she had confided her darkest and deepest secrets to the mare.

For that, he was grateful.

He had no qualms with being Natalia's friend and confidant, but she seemed to. There were nightmares that she wouldn't discuss with him. Fears that he could see in her eyes but she would never vocalize for his ears. Pain that she carried with her that she refused, rather stubbornly, to share with him.

And it had hurt him to see her carry it alone.

But now, with Tatiana as her Russian confidant, her faithful and trusty steed, she no longer carried it alone.

Maybe one day she would share those secrets, that pain, with him. But he wouldn't rush her.

A whinny pulled him from his thoughts and his eyes landed on the stall in question. He laughed, watching the young dunalino eye him and huff.

"Don't you worry, Boots." He replied to the horse's complaint. "You'll join Tat soon."

(Line Break)

Steve had always found sleep elusive during thunderstorms.

The concussive cacophony of thunder reminded him of the bombs and rockets of war, the patter of rain reminded him of thousands of troops firing their riffles, and the lightning that accompanied both reminded him of the flashes from both kinds of explosions.

So, naturally, he found himself curled around Natalia in her Queen sized bed, his nose deep in her auburn hair as he tried desperately to ignore the harsh storm outside.

"Did you have a good day today?" Natalia asked, her voice soft.

Steve nodded, not trusting his voice.

"Could you tell me what you did?"

A shake of the head.

Her small hands rested on his, her thumbs massaging circles into the backs of his muscular hands. "We are safe, Steve." She assured him.

Again, he nodded, his vocal cords as tight as his grip around her middle.

This bit of conversation was a gauging exercise. She had used this many times to determine just how bad Steve's discomfort was and would respond according. Usually, he responded very well to physical touch (like cuddling and her massaging his hands), familiar smells (like her hair and the little bit of perfume she wore), and softly spoken words of comfort.

However, this storm was very bad and this particular gauging exercise only confirmed that.

He was up to his eyes in flashbacks if he was only responding with nods and shakes. And gauging from the tightness with which he held her middle, it might have had something to do with Bucky.

Steve always reacted strongly when it came to his best friend. And Natalia understood why. He had witnessed his friend's "death" and after finding out that Bucky had been alive all that time had truly hurt the super soldier. He had blamed himself for a long time, and probably would continue to do so.

Deciding that she needed to move to a different tactic, she tapped on his hands twice, a signal that she wanted him to loosen his arms a bit.

He complied, and she turned in his arms to face him. Shifting a bit, so that their faces were very close, she placed both of her hands on the sides of Steve's face, her thumbs brushing gently across his cheekbones. "Eyes on me," She ordered gently.

His haunted blue eyes locked with hers and his grip on her tightened as another flash of lightning illuminated the room.

"You are safe, Steve." She said, her voice closer to his ear than the thunder that rolled outside. "I've got you. We are at the Ranch House. Clint and Laura live five minutes away. No bombs, no guns, no war. Just us and the horses. You are safe."

He processed her words and was desperate to believe her. Slowly, he relaxed, his forehead resting on hers, listening to the sound of her breathing, focusing on her thumbs on his face. And slowly, finally, slipped into sleep.

Smiling that she had broken through the flashbacks, Natalia waited until she was sure he wouldn't wake from the thunder before crawling out of his arms. As comfortable as she was, she knew he would appreciate it if she respected his wishes to not sleep in the same bed as her.

Pulling the blanket up to cover his shoulders and moving his soft hair from his face, she slipped over to the large window that was opposite the bed. Steve had constructed a comfortable window seat in the space below the window, and it was just long enough for her to sleep on. He had built it as a birthday present shortly after they arrived. It was a beautiful piece of craftsmanship, and probably had spurred on his desire to truly work on the barn. Picking up the blanket she had resting there, she turned her back to the glass, giving the soldier one final look before closing her eyes.

Her dreams were interrupted by a loud crack, causing her to jump from the window seat, looking around franticly for the source of her waking.

Steve was still asleep on her bed, and nothing seemed to be out of place. She smiled slightly at her sleeping friend, relaxing back into the window seat…until she noticed a weird glow coming from behind her.

Blinking, confused, she turned to the window…

And she was no longer sleepy.

"Steve! Steve!" She jumped out of the bed, slipping on a pair of shoes quickly, before reaching over the bed to shake the man's shoulder. "Wake up!"

"Hmmm?" He moaned lightly, his eyes opening in slits.

"You need to get up. Come on." She said, her voice very urgent.

He rubbed his eyes. "Nat?"

"Captain! GET UP!"

Steve snapped to attention, eyes wide and alert. "What? What is it?"

"The barn. It's on fire!"

* * *

The urgency in Natalia's voice spurred Steve to jump out of the bed and run down the stairs. The fog that had hung over his mind as he rose from sleep was gone. Just one thought filled his brain.

 _The barn is on fire._

Running out the back door and jumping off the small porch, he ran towards the burning structure, his eyes absorbing the red/yellow glow of the flames that licked around the right side of the building and were making their way around the rest of it.

"Yes, I have a fire at…" He heard Natalia state into her phone which she had the sense of mind to grab and call 911.

So Steve turned his attention to the fire at present. Part of him wondered just how it had gone up in flames…the earth was still damp around his bare toes and the rain seemed to have moved on.

So where…

However that thought was forcefully pushed from his mind as he heard a frantic whinny coming from the barn.

"Oh Lord…" he heard Natalia gasp. " _LIEUTENANT!_ "

Without a second thought, the two dashed to the door of the barn. Steve, with his super serum speed on his side, reached the door a full few seconds before Nat did. He seized the door and pulled as hard as he could…

Until he heard the structure groan.

Looking up, he saw that the fire had crawled across the front of the barn, and that the structure was probably weakening quickly as the flames ate through the wood.

"I-I can't open it anymore! The walls are weakening." Steve turned to Natalia, looking quite desperate.

She bit her lip before bouncing on her toes. "It's just big enough for me to get in. I'll get'em."

"Nat-" He began, ready to argue the point.

But she stopped him, pulling his face down to hers and pressing her lips to his, effectively shutting him up for a second. The kiss was gentle, but urgent. And over way too soon.

"No arguments, Steve." She retorted, pulling away from him and tore a strip of the t-shirt she wore off, making a covering for her nose and mouth. "I'll yell when you need to open the door."

And with that, she vanished into the barn.

Shaking this new fuzziness from his head – _focus, Rogers_ – he manned the door, awaiting her signal.

* * *

Natalia was glad she had been sleeping in one of Steve's t-shirts and a pair of yoga pants. The shirt because she could tear it without exposing her entire top to the flames and it was long enough to tear a strip off for her nose/mouth and anything else if she needed to. The yoga pants because they didn't hang at her ankles, decreasing the chance of her pants catching on fire.

Her eyes searched frantically in the already well-lit barn. The flames had caught on the dry straw that was in the two stalls on the right side of the barn, and was crawling across the ground of the barn. Soon every wall of this building would be in flames…

 _Why must straw be so flammable?_

She prayed that the poor horse hadn't hurt himself on his own stall…

Another frantic whinny drew her attention, and her eyes locked on Lieutenant's stall. He was backed away towards the back of the stall, his eyes wide and his nostrils flared.

She ran to the front of the stall, opening the door as calmly as she could, knowing that any sign of fear or urgency would spook the horse more than he already was. "Easy there, Lieutenant." Her voice was calm. "Easy. I'm here."

The 17 hands high stallion flicked his ears towards her, his deep eyes locking on hers. He didn't relax, but he stopped looking like he was going to rear.

"That's a good boy." She said, tearing the t-shirt once more. "Come on, Lieutenant. Our Captain needs us."

The horse's nostrils stopped flaring and Natalia approached with confidence. After a moment, she wrapped the torn shirt strip around the stallion's eyes and pressed on his neck to guide him out of the barn, speaking soothing words to him the whole time.

She guided Lieutenant safely towards the door of the barn, keeping herself between him and the majority of the flames, so the heat wouldn't spook him. It was getting hotter by the second, as the flames sapped up the oxygen, wood, and straw. But it didn't take them long to make it to the door.

"STEVE! NOW!" She screamed.

And everything moved so fast.

As the door tore open, she slapped Lieutenant's haunches, sending him galloping out of the burning barn.

Then there was a loud crack…

And she didn't have time to move.

One of the beams had been eaten through by the flames…and came tumbling towards her.

She felt the heat of the flames as her vision faded to black.

Leaving her in the burning barn.

* * *

Steve was tempted to chase after Lieutenant as he bolted out of the barn, but he was grounded to the spot, waiting for Natalia to emerge.

Begging God that she would come quickly behind the horse…

Instead, he heard a crack, and was in motion as the beam above the door started to cave. The beam fell into his hands and he screamed as he forced it up above his head, his blue eyes searching franticly for his red haired companion.

"NAT!" He screamed into the flames, and instantly regretted it as the smoke filled his nostrils and settled in his throat. He coughed violently, but continued to call out for her. "Nat!"

"Steve!" A voice called from behind him. A male voice.

 _Not Nat!_ His frantic mind screamed.

 _It's Clint!_ The rational part of his brain added. _He must—_

But there was no time for that. _NAT!_

"Clint!" Steve called out to the other man, his hands starting to sting as flames licked at his flesh. But he couldn't let go of the beam until they got Nat…He refused to. "Nat's still inside!"

"Shit…" He heard the archer say. "Do you see her?"

"No! And she's not answering!" His voice was so thick with panic that he wasn't sure what he would choke on first: the smoke or his fear.

Clint didn't waste any time, ducking under Steve's arm, a piece of cloth around his nose and mouth, and headed into the flames. "Hold that beam for as long as you can!"

Steve nodded, knowing that as much as he wanted to rush into the barn himself and find Natalia, he knew that Clint couldn't lift beams like he could.

The moments (was it seconds, minutes? He couldn't tell) passed at a snail's pace, and Steve's heart thudded painfully in his chest, panic thre—

Then he saw them.

Clint was running towards him, through the fire, with a bundle in his arms.

 _Nat…_

With every bit of his strength, Steve held up that beam as the barn creaked again. It was going to collapse soon. But it wouldn't fall with them inside it.

He refused to let that happen.

Clint dove, with Natalia in his arms, under the soldier's arm once more, rolling away as Steve let the beam go.

The super soldier turn towards the former spy and watched for a moment, not really processing what was going on, as the other man rolled the woman on the ground.

Then it hit him.

 _She's on fire!_

Thanking God and Dr. Erskine, Steve ran as fast as he possibly could to the porch, pulling one of the blankets that Natalia kept there and ran back. "We need to smother the flames." He said, more to himself than to Clint, as he laid the cloth down.

Clint rolled the red head into the blanket, turning the woman into a "roll" of sorts, starving the flames of oxygen. "We need to cool her off."

"Tub on the first floor." Steve said, his voice calm and cool. The Captain was in present, leaving the anxious Steve behind. "Fill it with cool, _not cold_ , water. I'll make sure all the flames are gone."

The archer nodded and ran for the house, not arguing when his sister's well-being was on the line.

Adrenaline still thrumming in his veins, Steve focused on the wrapped Natalia. He patted the blanket, something that he had read helped in the "Stop, Drop, and Roll" method. Once he was sure that there was no flame like heat coming through the blanket, he scooped her into his arms and carried her into the house.

Clint was at the sink of the bathroom, washing his hands as Steve walked in. "Here. Let me take her." The archer said. "Just in case she has burns, I've washed my hands to minimize infection."

The soldier nodded. "What can I do?"

"Get your first aid kit. If she has other injuries, they'll need to be addressed."

He nodded once more and hurried to the kitchen, searching above the sink for kit. It didn't take long to locate it. He just wished that his hands would stop shaking, and wondering why Natalia hadn't said anything about him carrying her…

His thoughts were cut short as red flashing lights shown outside the window. Breathing a sigh of relief he hadn't known he'd been holding, he rushed to the bathroom and knocked on the door.

"The Fire Department is here. I'm gonna go talk to them."

"Good!" Clint called back. "Have a paramedic come in here."

"Will do." Steve said, leaving the first aid kit just inside the bathroom and dashing outside. Clint's voice had been even, so he didn't have reason to worry. It was probably just a precaution.

He opened the door to the house just as a fireman, a captain by the rank he wore on his helmet, walked up the steps of the porch.

"Evening, I'm Captain Richards." He began, shortly. "Anyone in the barn?"

Steve shook his head. "No. All horses and people are out. One of use got hurt on her way out, do you have a medic?"

"I've got two." Captain Richards said, bringing his radio to his lips. "No persons or animals in the barn. Charlie, Lee, get to the house, we've got injuries." After hearing several affirmatives, the fireman turned back to the soldier, taking out a note book. "How did the fire start?"

Steve explained the situation to the firefighter the best he could. Explaining that Natalia had woken him suddenly, shouting that the barn was on fire. That it seemed to originate on the right side of the building, which he remembered was the side where the wire that connected the lightning rod to the ground rods had been installed on. He stopped only to tell Charlie and Lee where Natalia was.

The fire captain had a few questions, but mainly he listened.

"That'll be all." He said once Steve was done telling his tale, then seemed to look him over more critically. "You really shou—"

" _Captain_ ," A voice cracked over the radio. " _We have an unresponsive female with extensive burns. Has that ambulance arrived yet?_ "

As if they could hear the call themselves, the siren of an ambulance filled Steve's ears.

"They just did, Charlie." Richards replied, his voice cool and calm.

" _Well, tell them to move their asses._ "

"Roger." The fire Captain replied, waiving towards the paramedics, signaling for them to hurry with that stretcher.

But all Steve could hear was the pounding of his own heart in his ears.

 _Unresponsive…extensive burns…unresponsive…extensive burns…_

He felt someone pull him to the side, and he just let them.

 _Nat's hurt…_

 _Nat's hurt…_

 _NAT'S HURT!_

"Captain!" A voice shouted at him, hands on his face and blue eyes swimming before his own.

Steve snapped to attention, his mind reeling into the present.

"We need to go." Clint said, his hands falling from Steve's face. "They are taking Nat to the hospital."

The soldier hadn't seen her being moved, which was probably a good thing considered he didn't want to be in the way. "Ho-How bad?"

"Bad enough," The archer said, honestly. "Laura and the kids are on their way over. They'll find Lieutenant, Boots and Tatiana. We need to go, Cap." He pulled on the taller man's arms.

"Why?" The Captain asked, feeling like the words weren't processing in his mind.

"Because you have burns, too." Clint answered, wrapping two cool, wet cloths around the super soldier's hands. "And Nat needs us."

* * *

A/N: Translations

(1) What's wrong, girl?

(2) It's okay, Tatiana.

(3) Come on, sweetheart. There are some sweet, soft grass, waiting for you.

Ok, and Tony wants to say something.

 **Tony:** THIS GIRL IS ON FIRRRRREEEEEEE!

 **Clint:**...

 **Steve:**...

 **Wanda:**...

 **Vision:**...

 **Ultron: ...**

 **Bruce:** What's Ultron doing here?

 **Ultron:** *in russian accent* I have come back to life.

 **Pepper:** *slaps Tony*

 **Tony:** What?! She is!

 **Nat:** I will kill you with fifty sheets of paper when I wake up.

 **Steve:** And I'll hold you down.

 **Tony:** _NOT COOL!_

 **Bruce:** Is no one else worried about Ultron being here!?

/End


	6. Chapter 6 (Part 1)

A/N: Hey everyone!

If any of you are in the Florida area, please be careful and take this weather seriously!

Reviews!

 **Guest:** Thank you! I'm so glad that you do!  
 **TheJollyRoger:** I like your name! She probably will. She's Natalia Romanova after all ;) I checked out the imdb and didn't see his name there...so I guess it's a rumor for now. But that would be an interesting turn of events... Also, did you see who's directing it? THE RUSSO BROS!  
 **Qweb:** Yes, burns are awful. I haven't had a burn to the extent that she has, but I've helped someone who has. It's not a pretty sight. Yep, she will be happy.

Alright, on to story stuff!

Alright, there is some angst in this chapter, but honestly, after the previous one, I think that would be a given.

This chapter was inspired by Luke Bryan's I See You. Besides that, not much connection to the song. It's a good song!

Again, I own nothing. I'm content with writing little, probably wrong turn of canon events for my enjoyment. I am making NO money off of this.

Warning: Discussion of burns in a lightly clinical manner. Nothing graphic.

* * *

 **I See You**

 _Later that night_

Steve watched with some fascination as the kind brunette nurse smeared burn cream on the palms of his hands and his fingers. Faintly, he could hear her saying how lucky he was to only have first degree burns.

The super soldier knew that it wasn't luck, but he didn't tell her that.

He's mind was focused on Clint, who stood just outside his room in the Emergency Room. Clint had somehow managed to escape the blaze with only lightly singed hair, and was currently speaking with the Patient Advocate of this ER. She was a kindly looking woman, with soft gray-blonde curls circling her grandmotherly face. She wasn't as old as Steve truly was, maybe in her mid to late fifties, and she looked like she knew what she was doing.

And Clint didn't look like he was on the offensive or defensive.

 _Good news, perhaps?_

"Mr. Rogers?" The nurse – _what was her name again_? – spoke up, catching his attention. "I'm all done here. I'll be back in a bit with your discharge instructions and some prescriptions."

Steve nodded, eyeing her badge for a moment before smiling at her, praying that it didn't look too fake. "Thank you, Karen."

She smiled and exited the room.

Once the door was closed behind her, Steve reached behind him to untie the ties of the hospital gown he had been forced to wear, but the opening of the door again halted his actions.

"I thought," Clint said, raising an eyebrow at the soldier. "That the doc said for you to relax."

"I'm being released," Steve said simply, dropping his arms as the archer closed the curtain to the door and walked behind the other man. A few moments later, the gown loosened as Clint undid the knots. "Any news?"

"I've got good and bad news." Clint replied evenly, taking the gown from Steve and handing him a button up shirt he had stuffed in a bag before they left the ranch. "Which do you want to hear first?"

The soldier swallowed thickly. _There was bad news…_ "Bad…" he whispered, taking the shirt, but not putting it on just yet. His eyes locked on Clint.

Clint took a seat beside Steve on the hospital cot. "The fire consumed all the feed and hay in the barn. The barn collapsed shortly after we left. Laura has yet to find Boots and Tatiana. And Nat…"

Steve felt his heart hit the floor at Clint's mentioning of Natalia, dread crawling up his throat, threatening to choke him.

"And Nat's in a coma."

 _Not dead._

 _Not good, but not dead._

His blue eyes stung as he blinked rapidly at this news. He wasn't sure if he was relieved or joyful or just more panicked. His emotions were all over the place and he didn't like it. "H-how bad is she?" He could feel his accent in his voice as he tried to speak around the lump in his throat.

"A beam fell on her, barely missing her head, but clipped her shoulders, driving her to the ground. They didn't find any evidence of a traumatic brain injury, but she was pretty scratched up from the beam. Her back and upper arms received a majority of the burns, but none of the burns wrap around any vital organs, her neck, or a limb."

Steve bit his lip hard, unfolding the shirt and slipping his arms through the holes in an effort to not clench his hands into fists and reinjure the already damaged tissue. 27% of her body was burned. 27%.

He knew the rule of 9s. The back was classified as 18% and each arm was 4.5%. Non-circumferential burns were less critical…but…

"Are her burns second or third degree?"

Clint looked away, his jaw clenched as if he was remembering seeing those burns before his very eyes. "Both. Where the beam wasn't on back has second degree burns. Where the beam fell on her has third degree burns."

Steve's arms shook as he did his best to not press the palms of his hands to his eyes.

 _This is your fault. You should have gone into that barn. You should be in that bed. You can handle that—_

"Wanna hear the good news?" Clint said, his voice lightening.

The soldier blinked but didn't look up at the archer, the demon in his head stopping for a minute. "That's all the bad news?"

Clint smiled, standing and walking over to the door. "Laura found Lieutenant and he's doing well, no burns, no injuries. Nat's in the best burn center in the state. And…"

Steve looked up at Clint's dramatic pause, and found eight pairs of eyes staring back at him. Blinking, he jumped to his feet as Clint let Wanda Maximoff in. The young woman practically ran towards him, and Steve barely had enough time to open his arms before she crashed into his chest.

"I called some friends." Clint finished, as the other Avengers filing into the room.

Tony Stark, Sam Wilson, Vision and Thor walked over to surround their Captain, while Drs. Bruce Banner and Helen Cho kept to the back of the room.

Steve looked around in shock at his friends.

"Wanda," Tony admonished, gently. "Stop hogging the man. He just held up a barn, I think he could use a break."

The woman's arms only tightened around the super soldier, and Steve realized that her shoulders were shaking. Wrapping his arms around her, he looked at Tony. "Leave her be," He said, his voice soft. "She's fine."

"We came as quickly as we could, Captain." Thor's booming voice cut in, just as loud as Steve remembered it to be. "How is Lady Natasha?"

The Captain blinked for a moment, blue eyes filled with confusion. _Who is N—oh. Duh._

"Nat's…she's hurt." He said, his voice thickening by the syllable. He wasn't sure if he could vocalize any more about her condition, so he looked at Clint, hoping the other man would take the initiative.

And take the initiative he did. "I'll explain how she is, but we'll need to go to another room. Kim says there is a small room around the corner that we can sit in."

Steve nodded his thanks to the archer as the shorter man lead everyone, save Wanda and the soldier, out of the room.

And as they were leaving, the nurse from before – Karen, right? – entered the room. "Quite a lot of visitors, Mr. Rogers."

Steve chuckled a bit, hoping that it didn't sound as fake to her as it did to himself. "Yeah. I guess they all heard about the fire."

Karen smiled lightly, showing him some papers that she had in her hands. "Well, I won't keep you long. This is your discharge paperwork. The instructions are about burns, how to dress them, signs of worsening and when to come back. Also there is script for an antibiotic in here as well. Just a precaution from the Doc."

Wanda turned in Steve's arms and faced the nurse once she was done. "We'll see that he follows the instructions to the letter." She said, her voice thick with her accent and obviously wanting the woman to leave so they could go.

"Good," Karen took the Sokovian's words in stride. "The rest of your group is in the first room around the corner to the right. Have a good rest of your night."

"Thank you," Steve said, moving towards the door with hurried steps, Wanda holding his arm the whole way.

* * *

 _Dawn the next day_

"Steve, for Gosh sake, sit your ass down." Tony ordered from his own seat in the conference room in the Emergency Room that they had spent the night in.

The blonde was tempted to keep pacing, if only to annoy the billionaire even more. But Sam, who had gotten up from his seat, stood in his path, arms crossed and looking exhausted.

"Come on, Cap," The dark skinned man said softly, but firmly. "Wearing a hole in the floor isn't gonna help her."

Steve stared at Sam for a long moment, torn between continuing to pace and doing what his friends wanted him to do, until his body made the decision for him and exhaustion slapped him upside the head. The lack of sleep finally catching up with him.

 _When was the last time I slept? Last night? The night before?_

It felt like ages ago.

With a slouch of defeat, Steve let Sam guide him to an empty chair next to a sleeping Wanda who was leaning against Vision.

It was quiet for a long moment as Steve leaned his head back and closed his eyes. And, like the soldier he was, fell promptly asleep.

When Tony was sure the Captain was asleep he nodded his head towards the door, eyes locked on Sam. The other man lifted an eyebrow, but stood and followed the billionaire out of the room.

Once the door clicked close, Tony let loose. "Okay. What the actual hell is going on?" He begins, his voice in a harsh growl. "Capsicle and Romanoff run off after the whole Thanos debacle and Clint only tells us about where they are _now_? Did you know about this?" His eyes narrow, accusing.

"No." Sam replies, simply. His voice calm. "Steve and Nat didn't let me in on their plans, and frankly, they didn't need to. They deserve a break."

The irritation in Tony's eyes cooled, as if the knowledge that he wasn't the only one left in the dark was enough to quench the anger boiling in his chest. "Okay. Glad to know I'm not the only one baffled by this."

Sam nodded. "I don't think it was anything personal, Stark. I'm pretty sure it was just because they wanted to get away."

The inventor opened his mouth, as if to add a comment, but was interrupted by the door they had just come from opening abruptly, revealing Vision, who's expression was somewhere between worry and confusion.

"What is it?" the former military man asked.

The android moved aside to reveal Wanda trying to wake Steve, who was thrashing about in his chair. "He won't wake."

Sam breathed a curse and rushed to his Captain's side, his hands clamping down on the flailing arms to prevent the sleeping man from further injury. "Captain!" He shouted in the man's face, praying that it would snap Steve out of whatever horror was going on behind those lids.

The response was nearly instantaneous as Steve's eyes flashed open, his chest heaving as he gasped for breath, his head moving from side to side as he searched the room. "Nat!" He called out, his voice sounding dry and broken. "W-Where's Nat!"

"Safe." Sam stated clearly, calmly. "And so are you. Dr. Cho and Clint are with Nat now."

Steve visibly relaxed, leaning his head back on the wall, a strange sound between a hiccup and a sob escaping his chest. Sam let up on the man's arms when he was sure he wasn't going to damage his injured hands.

"Well," A voice said from the doorway. "You are half right, Sam."

The occupants of the room turned to look. Clint stood there, a grim look on his face. "The doctor is allowing for visitors now." He said, looking pointedly at Steve.

The Captain shot to his feet. "Is she…?"

"Awake?" The archer finished and shook his head. "No."

Steve's head drooped in acknowledgement, that strange sound escaping his chest once more. His eyes moved to Wanda, who stood beside him, looking very worried. "Only one visitor at a time?" He asked the archer.

"For now."

The blonde seemed to be in some debate with himself as his eyebrows furrowed and he stared at a non-existent point between his nose and the floor. He was interrupted in his thoughts by Sam, who gave him a push towards the door. He blinked back at the man.

"Go." Wanda practically ordered. "Let us know how _mom's_ doing."

Sam cracked a smile. "Yeah, _old man_. Get going. She's not one to be kept waiting."

Steve's grin came a bit more forcefully, with a shake of his head. "You know she'd have your hides if she heard you say that."

The dark skinned man shrugged. "It's not like she hasn't already. Just get out of here already. The floor needs a break from you walking on it."

He didn't have to be told a third time.

* * *

Steve's hand shook as he reached for the handle of Natalia's room's door. The curtain of the room was pulled closed and he had no idea what he would see.

And his imagination had no problem with creating the worst possible scenario.

He was grateful that Clint didn't nag him about his hesitation, but he could feel the archer's eyes on him. Staring into his face. Studying. Processing information.

 _Must be a spy thing…_

"I'm gonna grab a cup of coffee." The man finally spoke up, filling the hesitant silence. "Want anything?"

The surprise from Clint speaking up forced Steve to move his hand. The cool of the metal handle was felt on his still warm skin under the bandages on his fingers. Reminding him of ice.

Shaking off that thought before it became more than just a thought, he shook his head and pulled the door open.

"I'll be back soon, okay?"

Another nod as the soldier made his way into the room.

The smell of the hospital was already thick in his nose, but the smell in this room just made him nauseated. Taking a steadying breath, he kept his eyes on his feet until he had closed the door and curtain behind him before he gave himself permission to look at the bed, and more importantly, the occupant of the room.

It was so…white, almost painfully so in this room. Sure, the lights were dimmed a bit, but the stark lack of color was only highlighted by the lower light. The room was meant for function and healing…not comfort.

It was such a contrast from the last room he had seen Natalia sleeping in.

And the contrast didn't end there. Spread against the whiteness of the pillow under her head, her hair screamed at him, beckoning him with its fierce red, the same color as the flames that put her here.

 _Lieutenant!_

He sat quietly in the chair beside her, his eyes intently focused on her face. The fire had not touched it, had not marred her beauty.

And he found himself frowning, wondering why she wasn't on her stomach…the burns were on her back…so…

 _Possible brain injury._ A part of his brain spoke up as he took in the bandage that wrapped around her crown. The beam that landed on her must have clipped her head before driving her to the ground…

Swallowing thickly, his eyes moved of their own fruition, taking in all the injuries she had suffered that he could see.

A thick bandage wrapped around her shoulders which were visible over the thin sheet that appeared to have fallen off of her a bit. With a shaking hand, he reached out and pulled the thin and coarse fabric up higher, persevering more of her dignity.

His damaged fingers brushed her chin, and he felt the knot in his throat tighten at the softness of her skin.

 _It should be me in this bed._

His heart clenched painfully at the guilt that threatened to overwhelm him. His hands shook, as if debating if he should risk damaging his hands more and pressing them to his face or to grip her hand which rested, untouched by the flames, atop the sheet. Eventually, he settled for resting his hands in his lap.

 _You aren't worthy enough to touch her. Not after what happened._

His thoughts were broken by the sound of the door opening. Steve stood quickly as a man wearing a white lab coat and a badge entered.

The newcomer wore a pair of wire framed, rectangular glasses and had short-almost military short- cropped salt and pepper hair. He had a large smile on his round face that matched the one in his serious yet pleasant brown eyes.

"Doctor," Steve said, offering his injured right hand for a handshake out of pure reflex.

The doctor lifted an eyebrow at the Steve's hand. "That might not be a good idea with those burns of yours, Mr…"

"Rogers." Steve finished, retracting his hand sheepishly, his name feeling odd on his tongue after saying it so many times tonight. "Steve Rogers."

The doctor's smile returned. "I'll shake your hand once your hand heals, how about that, Mr. Rogers. Pleasure to meet you all the same." He gestures for Steve to sit again. "I'm Dr. Tomas, Ms. Romanova's physician. You can sit."

Steve did as he was directed and Dr. Tomas followed suit, sitting across from the soldier.

"So," Dr. Tomas began. "I see you and Ms. Romanova have had quite an eventful night."

The soldier nodded, not trusting his voice for the moment.

"I was hoping you may be able to fill in some of the details." The doctor continued, his warm brown eyes resting on Steve's face. "Mr. Barton has been quite helpful, but you were there from the beginning. I'll be sending her for some more testing, and you're telling of the event tonight may help me find something I may have missed."

 _Like why she's in a coma._ The voice in the back of his head finishes.

"Of course," Steve replies, clearing his throat. _Anything to help her._ "Where should I start?"

The doctor leaned back in his chair. "From the beginning of the fire."

And so he did.

* * *

A/N: And that's the end of this chapter.

The next chapter will pick up in the hospital, pretty much right after Steve finishes talking with Dr. Tomas. This chapter just kept going and going and going...so I decided to divide it up. I should have the next chapter up soon!

Side note: Dr. Tomas' comment about the burns on Steve's hand is because he recognizes the bandage. I'm pretty sure Steve's doc didn't break confidentiality by discussing his patient with another doctor.

Thank you for reading! Please leave a review if you like!

~Rachel


	7. Chapter 6 (Part 2)

A/N: Hello again, everyone!

I pray all of you are safe and well!

Reviews!

 **TheJollyRoger:** Well, it would certainly be interesting if Ultron showed up, no matter what his form. And yes, I did hear about Coulson being on the cast list! This makes me very happy! And yes, I did bring Banner into this. He has a purpose. I'm not going to just leave him hanging or bash the heck out of him. And it's okay to be curious! Unfortunately, you're at my mercy for answers. But I'll be kind. We'll get to see a bit of Banner in this chapter.

 **Qweb** : Well...not extremely bad of an idea, since he's only got 1st degree burns and they'll be gone by the next morning at the earliest because Super Soldier Serum. And here you go! I hope you like!

 **LilyRose14:** I'm sorry I missed your review! Yes! I thought that the Lava was a cute touch. Feelzy but cute. Team Tangled FTW! And the horses were a spur of the moment idea. But I thought, eh what the heck, they are on a ranch anyway! We'll see more of the horses later, promise.

Notes:

Like I said at the end of the last chapter, this is a direct continuation of the previous chapter. I hope it does it justice.

Natalia will be referred to as Natasha a lot in this chapter. I've decided to poke into the heads of the other Avengers present in the story, and they don't know/use Natasha's real name. So, sorry in advance about the confusion.

Alright! Enough of me. I own nothing and all that jazz!

Enjoy!

Warning: Blood/blood donation mentioned. Nothing graphic.

* * *

 **ICU (Part 2)**

 _Later on that morning_

Shortly after speaking with Natalia's doctor, the order for admission to the hospital had been placed for the red head. Steve had wanted to remain by her side the whole time, but he wasn't permitted to go to the radiology tests with her.

Regardless of the fact that radiation probably wouldn't do a damn thing to him…

But he understood their caution and, afraid that he would get in the way, decided to slip out, find the others, and get a cup of coffee.

While looking for Kim, the patient advocate, to ask where he could find a good cup-a-joe, he ran into Tony. The billionaire was having a rather muted (and with a shocking lack of flirting in his posture and face) conversation with one of the women at the front desk. As Steve came closer, he heard the tail end of the conversation as Tony pointed to a piece of paper he placed for the woman to pick up.

"…Be sure that all bills for Ms. Romanoff and Mr. Rogers come to this address." The brunette said solemnly.

"That won't be necessary, Tony." Steve cut in, lightly, surprising the billionaire.

The other man turned his brown eyes on to the Soldier, his eyes pointedly avoiding Steve's hands. "No," He said, softly, his tone leaving no room for argument. "It is absolutely necessary."

"I can take care of the bills," Steve continued, his voice still soft, not wanting to pick a fight. "You don't have to do this."

"But I _want_ to, Steve." There was a flash of something in the man's brown eyes. Something Steve hadn't seen in them in a long time.

 _Guilt._

"This isn't your fault."

The woman at the desk, who had been politely allowing them to speak quietly, broke into the conversation. "Excuse me. I need to assist a patient. I'll be right back."

Steve nodded at her and guided Tony away from the desk.

"I know," The billionaire replied. "Please let me do this, Steve. As a penance. I've messed up a lot in the past, hurting both you and Natasha. Please…just let me help."

The soldier had never seen Stark beg before. Hell, he had never seen him admit to hurting people or being wrong.

Anthony Stark was really shook up, and Steve relented.

"Alright." He conceded.

"And no paying me back, Cap."

"Okay," Steve said, smiling slightly, his blue eyes glistening a bit. "Thank you."

The other man looked pretty close to losing it. Steve would have put a hand on the man's shoulder if it wasn't for the burn bandages. Instead he settles for wrapping an arm across the brunette's shoulders. "You are forgiven, Tony. Nat and I forgave you years ago."

That statement seemed to make the other man both relax and look closer to crying. "I wish things had been better between us. That we hadn't been at odds with each other for so long and so often."

"Hey," Steve broke through the man's sorrow with a light shake of his shoulder. "Water under the bridge, Tony. Really. We were two alphas in the same pack, it was only natural we would butt heads. But now, we have a new start. So, let's make the most of it. Let's take care of our team."

Tony nodded, blinking a bit as he straightened, and wrapped his own arm around Steve's back. "To new beginnings."

Steve smiled. "To new beginnings."

* * *

Steve ultimately decided that getting a hot cup of coffee wouldn't do his hands any good, and settled for water. It wasn't like caffeine actually kept him awake longer, anyway. His metabolism burned it off. Just like alcohol.

Cradling the cup of water in his bandaged hands, he returned to Natalia's room just as she was returning from another test.

He waited outside, like a guard, reminding himself of their time in S.H.I.E.L.D. when they would check in with medical. They would wait for each other outside of each other's room, depending on their particular injuries. Shaking his head of the memory, focusing on the here and now.

The nurse got Natalia all settled and beckoned for him to return to the room. Smiling, he entered, taking a sip of the cool liquid in the cup in his hands, soothing his throat. He was about to resume his position in the chair beside her bed, when another nurse, a tall male, rushes in with an IV bag.

Red filled bag.

The ice that he thought he had escaped years ago crawled back into his bones, and he stood there, helpless and frozen, breath stalled in his chest, as the two nurses added the red fluid to Natalia's IV lines.

He'd seen a transfusion before. And that's exactly what this looked like.

When he finally found his voice, he spoke up. "W-why is she receiving blood?" He asked, wishing his voice sounded calmer.

The nurse that had been there since his arrival looked up at him. "Her platelet count is low. Dr. Tomas said it most likely has to do with the burnt lacerations on her back."

 _Lacerations…_

He tried to place that, then remembered the beam. It must have scratched her back up before the fire got to her flesh.

The nurse was continuing to speak, so Steve focused on her voice.

"…we will be taking her soon to relieve the pressure that the burnt tissue is building on her back. The extra blood also helps the healing process."

The male nurse leaned over towards the other nurse and spoke softly. And he did his best to not eavesdrop, but his hearing wasn't something he could just turn off.

" _That's the last bag of O Neg we can spare. We could get another trauma…"_

Steve froze again at that information, before moving. "I'm O Negative." He began to roll up his sleeve.

Both nurses turned to look at him, as if surprised that he had figured out what he said.

"Please, I'll gladly give a donation." His voice was begging now, wanting more than anything to be useful. _For her._

The male nurse straighten and nodded, walking to the door. "I'll see if there is someone available to take a donation."

* * *

 _Later that day_

Sam leaned hard against the walk, trying to make himself as small as possible in the hallway as patients were move back and forth in the Emergency hallways. He'd been in many Emergency Rooms over the years. It never really got easier being among as much suffering, but it was worth being there for a friend.

Or in his case, two.

Steve had been taken by another member of the staff about an hour and a half ago and Sam had followed him as far as the door, where he watched Steve sit in a recliner chair and get hooked up for a…blood donation.

He should have known that Steve would do this. He holds up buildings the night before and is well enough to give blood the next day.

Shaking his head, Sam had taken to keeping guard at the door.

So, when Steve finally emerged, he gave him an almost ridiculous look, looking pointedly at the pressure bandage wrapped around the crook of Steve's elbow.

"What?" The super soldier said. "They need the blood."

"Let me guess," Sam began, shifting comfortably. "You are O Negative."

"Guilty," Steve replied, looking a bit sheepish.

Sam laughed, slapping the other man on the back lightly. "Even your blood wants to save everyone!"

The blonde returned the laugh, shaking his head as he rolled down his sleeve. "How's our favorite CIA agent doing?" He asked, changing the topic.

And Sam let him. "Sharon's been well. She was certainly surprised, but not too much, when you vanished two years ago. That message you left for us really eased her mind, however."

Steve nodded. Although running away with Natalia had been an easy decision to make, leaving his teammates without a word had been impossible to do. So, he had left a few notes for his team, notably for Sam, Sharon, Wanda, Scott, and Tony.

He had contemplated leaving a message for Vision, Bruce, and Thor, but he didn't have time. He knew word would get around, so he hadn't worried about it.

After all, he had been worried about Natalia.

As he was now.

Speaking about Sharon was just a courtesy, and Steve was sure Sam knew that.

It wasn't that he didn't care about Sharon, far from that. And if the situation was different, and Sharon was injured in the hospital instead of Natalia he'd probably be acting the same.

 _That's a lie and you know it._

Okay. Maybe not _exactly_ the same. But he would certainly be concerned.

"They brought Natasha upstairs about forty-five minutes ago." Sam said, volunteering the information he was sure his Captain really wanted to hear. "Wanda went with her and Clint took everyone else back to his place."

Steve nodded. It made sense that Clint would open his doors to the team. He'd have to let Clint know later that his three rooms would be available for the team to settle in.

He doubted very much that he would be able to sleep at home while Natalia was in here. "Let's join Wanda."

Sam looked his friend up and down. He didn't look like he would fall over anytime soon after all the blood he donated, but you couldn't be too careful. Super Soldier serum or no, Steve was still very much human, something that his battle with the Winter Soldier all those years ago had proven to the man who wore metal wings into battle. "Were you able to get any sleep?"

Steve shook his head, deciding it would be best to be honest. "Maybe an hour or so last night, but I haven't really slept since before the fire." His voice was soft. 48 hours without sleep, without real sleep, wasn't that big of a deal for him. He had gone for longer. But if he was to keep his wits about him, it probably wouldn't be a good idea for him to stay awake much longer.

"Maybe we should get you home so you ca—"

"No." Steve cut him off, looking straight ahead as he walked towards the elevator. "Please, Sam. I don't want to leave without her." As he reached the doors and pressed the call button, he turned a grin towards his friend. "Plus, I hear the chairs upstairs are more comfortable and better for the back than the ones down here."

Sam couldn't help but chuckle at that. "That alone makes you sound like an old man, Steve."

The soldier shrugged. "Being on a Ranch does that to ya."

Still smiling, the shorter man dropped the subject and decided that if the man beside him didn't get some rest once they made it to Natasha's room, he'd knock the Super Soldier out himself.

Well…if he figured out a way to do that.

* * *

Fortunately for Sam, it never came to that.

Almost instantly after sitting in those much-more-comfortable-than-the-ER chairs in Natasha's room in the Burn Unit, Steve had been out like a light, his hands resting in his lap and his head lulled back. And the Falcon wasn't sure if his near-instantaneous sleep was from pure exhaustion, or the fact that he gave blood earlier that hour.

Frankly, it might have been a combination of both.

And Sam wasn't going to look this gift horse in the mouth. Steve needed his rest. So he pulled out his iPod and portable speakers, setting them on a table between the two sleeping former superheroes, setting it up just like he had when Steve had been the one laying in a hospital bed. Turning on some soft, comfortable music, he left the room, Wanda not far behind him.

"How's he doing?" The Scarlet Witch asked as he closed the door to the room behind them. "He didn't say anything to me, though he acknowledged my presence. Granted, I'm not surprised. He only had eyes for Natasha."

Sam nodded in agreement, leading her down the hall to the small waiting area where they could talk freely. "He's pretty worried. He doesn't want to leave her without her."

A sly smile, that Sam could only conclude had been brought into being after her tutelage under the Black Widow, crawled along her lips. "I wonder if they finally decided drop the acts and confess." She speculated, resting a thoughtful hand on her chin as they walked into the waiting room.

"I wouldn't hold your breath." A new voice said, startling the young Avengers.

They both turned to look, blinking at Clint who sat there, arm slung over the back of the chair he sat in and legs stretched out before him. The man smiled at their faces. "That never gets old…" He whispered to himself, before shifting a bit, beckoning them to have a seat. "I talked to our dear Captain about that very subject about a year ago, and he has yet to take Nat out on a date."

Sam chuckled, shaking his head as he sat in a chair opposite the Hawkeye. "Classic Cap and Widow. If this," He gestured vaguely in the direction of Natasha's hospital room. "Doesn't change that, we may have to have an intervention."

Wanda sank into her own chair near Clint and frowned. "Why haven't they said anything? You'd think with the amount of espionage training they have they wouldn't be able to keep secrets from each other for this long."

"You'd be surprised." Clint said, moving slightly so that he was facing both of them. "Remember that Nat is a spy and Steve is a soldier. They have both been trained to retain information under any circumstance. That includes about what they feel and think. And even if they were able to read it from the other, with all the lies that they've told themselves and each other, do you really think they would take such an observation seriously?"

Sam didn't say a word, his face impassive, but he could see where the marksman was coming from.

Wanda, however, rolled her eyes. "If that's the case, they are stupidly in love."

"Try telling them that."

"I just might."

There was a long silence in the waiting room, as if they were trying to figure out just what to say next…or do about the two sleeping former Avengers down the hall.

"You both know why Steve brought Nat out here, right?"

The question from Clint pulled the two younger members out of their thoughts. They nodded slowly.

"Well, vaguely anyway." Wanda added.

"Steve said in his letter that they were leaving to rebuild themselves and heal from all the madness that they had fought against in the world." Sam agreed.

The archer nodded, moving so his elbows were resting on his knees and his chin in his hands. He stared at the floor for a moment before speaking. "When Steve and Nat arrived at my door two months after Thanos they were both exhausted and broken." He began slowly, and the two younger occupants of the room listened closely. "They were holding each other upright, and looked like demons had been closing in on them. The light that had burned so bright in their eyes was missing, as if it had been snuffed out by the terrors that followed them. It was a hard thing to see…and the first night was the worst. They both had horrendous nightmares that neither would speak about later, and Laura and I could never console them in those moments. Steve could only be awoken and soothed by Nat, and Nat could only be awoken and soothed by Steve."

Sam didn't look so surprised by this. He had dealt with his own demons after Thanos and didn't expect anyone to not be suffering after everything that had happened.

Wanda, on the other hand, looked very distraught at the news of what her mentors had suffered.

"Even after they bought the ranch, they didn't sleep well, but it eventually got better. Nat spent time with my kids and Steve worked on the barn. Eventually, the spark in their eyes started to return, and I could see they were healing better together." Clint looked down at the floor again. "But the demons are still there, and I don't think they'll be ready to move forward together just yet. Especially after this." He pointed at the door. "I wouldn't be surprised if Steve is blaming himself for this. And when Nat wakes up," He shook his head, not really knowing what to say about that. "Things could be very different."

"But it's not his fault." Wanda stated firmly.

Clint shook his head. "No. No, it's not."

Sam leaned his head back against the wall behind his chair. "I hope she wakes up soon."

"Me too."

* * *

Tony found himself in Steve's office at the ranch house. He had been wandering aimlessly around the Barton property for hours, not really wanting to go back to the hospital. He always hated those places… Eventually he asked Laura for directions to get to Steve and Nat's home, and found himself at their door.

Which had been unlocked, and he let himself in.

The home was warm and inviting, reminding Tony of the soldier who enjoyed making people comfortable, but it also had a stylish edge, suggesting that Steve had left most of the furniture selection to The Widow while he painted the walls.

The office was neat and organized, shelves of books on various topics – mainly horses – organized in alphabetical order by author and the desk had several stacks of different sized paper atop it. The largest set of paper drew his attention.

They were architectural plans.

Tony touched the paper delicately. He could see Steve's precise handwriting in the margins, giving the plans more personality, explaining just what Steve was trying to do or what each plan was for. Steve had always put his very self into everything he did.

That's why he had such a hard time with the Accords.

Tony had mulled over that time in their lives in the years between the start of the Accords and Thanos, and even after that. And eventually, he had concluded that Steve had been right, to a certain extent.

Having the government make the final call as to where and when they were deployed greatly diminished their effectiveness. But Steve had never fully disagreed with the concept of oversight - he had worked under S.H.I.E.L.D. and SSR before that after all – but had concluded that it needed to be someone or somebody who wasn't biased for or against the Avengers.

And true neutrality had been hard to find.

Ross was a prime example of that.

Thaddeus Ross had been a thorn in the signers of the Accords' side since the beginning, and even before that. Most notably with Bruce Banner. The former Lieutenant General turned Secretary of State had been searching for Bruce like a bloodhound after an allusive prey.

Tony couldn't help but thank whatever higher power was out there watching over Bruce considering he had avoided the Accords and Ross.

But even Tony had been able to see the man's grudge against "vigilantes".

A whinny pulled the man out of his thoughts about the past, and he turned to look. A large, black stallion stood just beyond the window, led by a halter by Clint's eldest son – Cooper, right? A fitted blanket was draped around the horse and his ears kept twitching as the young brunette lead him past the house.

Intrigued, Tony looked between the horse and the plans.

The plans were of the barn. The barn that housed this graceful animal.

The barn that had burned.

Almost without thinking, Tony pulled out his phone. "F.R.I.D.A.Y."

"Good afternoon, boss." The female sounding, Irish accented program replied.

"Scan these plans and update them to the best fire and flooding prevention standards. We've got a few animals to help."

* * *

Tony nearly barreled into Bruce and Thor on his way out of the house.

"How was it in there?" the physicist asked, falling into step beside the genius on the right while Thor took up the left.

"Cozy, warm, inviting, but with just enough style to suggest that Cap let Romanoff have her way with the décor. They live comfortably, have the Bartons over regularly. Steve cooks, Natasha does the laundry. It's quite domestic." His words have a bit of edge to them, as if he is gnawing on a problem that just won't let up, and that sets the doctor on edge.

"It sounds like they are doing quite well for themselves." Thor adds, sounding calm, as if ignoring the edge in his friend's voice. "It is quite peaceful out here."

"See, that's what I don't get." Tony adds after a moment, stopping in his tracks. His companions looked at him, stopping as well. "Back, after Ultron, Cap and I had a talk about this kind of life. And he specifically said that the man who wanted all of this," He waived at the house and the openness around them. "Went into the Ice back in 1945 and another man came out. So, what exactly are he and Widow doing out here?"

The two other men blinked, Banner looking more confused and Thor looked at Tony like he was missing the point.

"For the same reason that Barton settled out here, Stark." Thor spoke up, his tone suggesting that it was obvious, without being patronizing. "To find peace. You saw how our Captain was during the battle with Thanos. How exhausted and desperate he was for it all to end. The man has suffered enough, Stark. And I do believe that Lady Natasha has as well."

Tony openly stared at the Asgardian, puzzle pieces falling into place, but the whole picture wasn't revealed just yet.

"The Captain must have realized that Lady Natasha was just as broken as he was, and, ever being the noble man, took her away from everything so she could heal."

And suddenly, it all made sense. Every single plan that had been on Steve's desk had been about small projects (save the Barn, that was a huge undertaking), but all of them had been for making _Natasha's_ life easier. A window seat design that was both functional and comfortable, a larger laundry room so she could maneuver around the space better and get more accomplished in a shorter amount of time, the fact that her room was almost personally constructed by Steve's hands, and even the barn and the horses that lived within it – a safe place for companions to help her heal.

Everything had been about _her._

And it was so _stupidly_ like Steve.

He laughed a bit, shaking his head. "Ever putting others before himself," He said, mostly to himself.

Thor nodded in agreement, smiling.

But Bruce's face was a mask of uncertainty, as if he was still missing a few of the puzzle pieces. Which…granted he was, since he hadn't entered the Rogers/Romanoff sanctuary. Not like Tony had.

Tony shook his head. "They live like roommates, similarly to how they did at the tower. She sleeps upstairs, he down stairs." He said, casually, walking again around the house towards the backyard. "Ever the gentleman, Captain Chivalry gave Romanoff the Master."

Thor chuckled and slapped Tony on the back. "I would expect nothing less from our Captain."

Bruce remained silent. And it didn't take a super genius like Tony to guess why.

Ever since Steve and Natasha had run off two years ago, the genius billionaire would prod (read: harass) the genius with two personalities about why he and the Widow hadn't been the ones to run off. Banner had been very short in his answers. Saying things like "it wasn't our time" or "I'm done with running" (which was most likely a lie, considering he still ran from fights) or "plans changed."

Tony had a suspicion that Bruce still had a thing for Natasha, even if it was not nearly as fierce as it had been during the whole Ultron debacle. But, Natasha's behavior suggested that it was strongly one side if that was the case.

 _I mean…she ran away and started a new life out here with the Bartons and_ Steve _of all people._

He had known Natasha for a while, and concluded that she wasn't one to wallow in couldas, shouldas, and wouldas. She was ever on the move, sometimes on the run. And while this particular venture wasn't like the ones she had gone off on after S.H.I.E.L.D. fell, it was still an escape, a new life.

A fresh start. The thing she had always wanted.

No more blood in her ledger.

And Bruce needed to move on.

Shaking his head of these thoughts, Tony looked up at the wreckage that had been the barn. "I found the plans Cap had for the barn." He said simply, pulling out his phone again. "They are pretty good. All safety standards met and exceeded."

"So…" Banner started, crossing his arms as he stopped next to the billionaire. "How did it go up in flames?"

"Lightning." Thor cut in, moving towards the right side of the barn and kneeling down by the burned wood. "A powerful strike."

"High voltage," Tony confirmed, standing beside Thor and looking at the cord that had once run from the lightning rod to the ground rods. "Possibly a positive lightning strike."

"Clint had said the storm had moved away when the barn went up," Bruce added, standing opposite to Tony next to Thor.

"A bolt from the blue." The billionaire said softly. "Or in this case, black."

Bruce nodded, and Thor shrugged, not entirely getting the idiom.

After a moment of silence, Tony spoke up again, lifting up his phone and having F.R.I.D.A.Y. project the plans before them. "F.R.I.D.A.Y. has updated Steve's design. This isn't going to happen again, and if it does," He paused for a moment. "Natasha and Steve are going to be safe getting their horses out."

Thor smiled. "I think that would be a lovely coming home present."

None of them dare mention that it probably will be a while before the two former Avengers actually come home.

* * *

A/N: Long chapter, FTW!

Note: Burns + Previously damaged skin = problems. It's a real thing. Especially if the damage involves a laceration. The deeper the laceration, the deeper the burn can go and the more damage it causes. Basically, Nat's got some bad burns.

Alright, the next chapter will be a direct sequel to this half of the chapter, taking place mere hours after this one.

Until next time!  
~Rachel


	8. Chapter 7

A/N:

Ok. Before I get started, I would like to remind everyone that Steve is Catholic in this story, based off of his Earth-616 self. There are a LOT of references to Catholic doctrines, beliefs, practices and services in this. I have studied Catholicism and have returned to being a Catholic in a similar way to Steve...hence how I know these things. I am not an expert, but I am well studied. There is a homily in here that was inspired by a real homily I attended and the priest who gave it is the inspiration for the priest in this story.

If you have any questions about the Catholic stuff in here, I'd happily give answers via PM.

Note: I own nothing.

Title comes from Disney's Hunchback of Notre Dame. Enjoy!

* * *

 **God Help the Outcasts**

 _A few hours later_

Steve slowly rose out of unconsciousness. A dreamless sleep was so unusual for the Super Soldier, and it was a bit disorienting to rise from such a sleep.

But he wasn't about to complain about getting some much needed sleep.

Rubbing his eyes, he looked around, and noticed that Natalia was missing.

He was on his feet in a flash, noting that her bed was also gone, but she was _gone_ nonetheless. He walked with hurried steps towards the door of the Burn Unit room. Just outside of the door, he noticed a male nurse. Catching the name on the man's badge, he called out to him.

"Uh…Brian?"

The man lifted his head, and Steve could have sworn he was looking at Jim Morita. "Yes, sir?" The man answered, his voice thick with a Chicago accent.

"Is Ms. Romanova in a test?" Steve asked, swallowing thickly. "Is she awake?"

The Asian man nodded, slowly. "Yes, she should be back from her test shortly. And no, sadly, she has not woken up yet." He smiled lightly, showing off his white teeth. "Would you like me to get you anything?"

The soldier shook his head, relaxing a bit, knowing that Natalia was safe. "Are any other visitors for her here?"

Brian nodded, locking up his computer. "They are waiting in the waiting room down the hall. I can take you there."

"If it's no trouble," Steve replied, pretty sure he could find the room himself in the man needed to get some work done. "I'd appreciate it."

Brian stood and led Steve down the hall to the waiting area, where the blonde was greeted by four sets of eyes.

"I'll let you know when she returns," Brian said before leaving them be.

Steve nodded his thanks and resisted the urge to shove his hands in his pockets as he walked into the waiting area.

"Looks like sleeping beauty finally woke up," Sam jabbed, a smirk spreading across his face.

The Super Soldier rolled his eyes and sat beside the dark skinned man. He smiled at Clint and Wanda before nodding to Dr. Helen Cho. "Doctor."

"Captain." She replied, smiling lightly. "How are you?"

He sat back in his chair, thinking through his potential answers and decided it would be best to be honest. "Been better. My hands are fine – pretty sure the burns are gone now. But Nat's not."

Helen nodded slowly. "I spoke with her doctor and offered the regeneration cradle as a possible graft replacement once the eschar is removed."

 _Eschar…that's burnt tissue, right?_

"Thank you," Steve said with a smile. "I'm sure that the faster she gets out of here, the happier she'll be." He had learned the hard way just how much she hated hospitals.

"Is she awake?" Clint chimed in.

The soldier shook his head. "Unfortunately, there has been no change."

Clint nodded, not looking very happy about that. But then again, the woman had been struck from behind by a beam of wood…

The conversation drifted to different topics. Wanda and Sam talking about what they'd been up to recently, Helen adding in her own bits and Clint getting everyone caught up on the lives of his kids.

Steve found himself listening in silence. Sure he added a few things here and there, laughing and groaning at the appropriate times. But his mind wasn't in this conversation.

It was wherever Natalia was.

And he strongly doubted that would change anytime soon.

An hour or so passed before Brian returned to let them know that Nat had returned from her test, and also informed them that the doctor had given them all permission to visit with her if they so wished, as long as they were calm and courteous of the other patients and families in the unit.

After thanking Brian, everyone but Helen headed to go see their injured friend.

Helen had gotten a call not long before Brian returned, and the call had been so urgent that she had been required to leave immediately. She said her goodbyes and assurances that she would be back as soon as she could before leaving.

So, Steve, Sam, Wanda and Clint continued their conversation in Natalia's room, the Super Soldier resuming his position in the chair immediately to her right unchallenged.

"Hey, Cap." Sam cut in at one point, causing the blonde man to look up. The darker skinned man was pointing at an IV line. "Is this your blood?"

Steve frowned. When had she needed more blood? Was her platelet count still dropping? He wracked his brain looking for an answer, but came up with none.

"It's dated donated today, and it's O Neg."

Steve shrugged. "Maybe. Maybe not. Someone else could have donated blood today."

The other man also shrugged, not convinced, but there wasn't really a way to truly knowing. It wasn't like after a donation was made that Steve had a right to know who received his blood.

But…considering that Super Soldier Serum did run in his veins…

He shook that thought away, though there was a warmth that spread in his chest at the idea of _his_ blood running in _Natalia's_ veins. And deep down, he hoped that it was his blood. Because maybe, just _maybe_ , his serum would help her heal.

* * *

 _One Week Later: November 1_ _st_ _._

Steve checked the time on his phone once more, just to be sure that he had the right time…for the 10th time…and straightened his jacket (for the 12th).

If Natalia could see him now, she would have slapped him and told him to relax.

 _Stop fidgeting and just go in!_

Straightening his shoulders and nodding to the voice who spurred him on, he reached out and opened the door.

One of the things he had been thankful for about this hospital was that it had a chapel, and not just any chapel, a Catholic Chapel, with a Catholic priest as Chaplin. And the cherry on top was that they had Mass daily.

He had stumbled upon this hidden gem while wandering the halls of the hospital one afternoon when Natalia had gone for an unusually long eschar procedure a two days after her arrival, and found himself spending nearly as much time in the chapel as he was with her.

The old habits that his mother had drilled into him as a child had never gone away, but he hadn't been entirely faithful to the practices that she had handed down to him since leaving the ice. Though he did his best to attend Mass on Sundays and confession when it was offered. But "little things," like his Rosary, the one his mother made for him and the one that had been in breast pocket when he crashed the _Valkerye,_ simply remained in his pocket kind of like spare change, rather than a spiritual tool to be used.

At least until he found himself in this very chapel five days prior.

And with Natalia's condition being what it was – stagnant between true healing and decay, a limbo of sorts – he fled back to the old practices, falling back into the old rhythm with ease. The Latin words of each prayer rolling off his tongue in the silence as if they had never stopped. As if he hadn't stopped saying them for over 80 years. Praying, _begging,_ that Natalia be brought back to them, to him.

Genuflecting to the tabernacle (1), Steve slid into his usual pew and knelt on the floor. There were kneelers, but he didn't want to break them. Closing his eyes, he began to pray the prayers before Mass silently.

Until a hand rested on his shoulder.

He turned to look, a smile pulling at his lips as his eyes met the kindly grey eyes of Father Patterson, the Chaplin. Steve had met him the day he found this hidden chapel and since then had had many conversations with the faithful priest.

He had found out that the godly man had been a Navy Chaplin for years prior to settling down here in this remote hospital's chapel. He listened to and consoled the soldier-turned-rancher's anxieties and self-imposed crosses better than any psychologist Steve had been sent to see since the Battle of New York.

"Good morning, Steven." The (physically) older man greeted kindly.

"Good morning, Father."

"I don't mean to disturb you from your prayers, but I could use your assistance in the Sacristy."(2)

Steve blinked and almost jumped to his feet. "I'd be happy to help."

Father Patterson smiled his gratitude. "It appears that Ms. Thompson, who usually is my Sacristan, is unable to make it today. There are some duties that she performs that I cannot do while also celebrating the Mass. I'll gladly give you a rundown of what you'll need to do."

Steve nodded, happy to be helpful. "Of course. Lead the way."

* * *

Father Patterson had been right. There were several duties he couldn't do while at the altar that required a sacristan.

Like counting how many were in attendance for Holy Communion (the chapel was almost overflowing and Steve had been happy to give up his seat for an elderly woman who had arrived a bit latter than the others), finding someone to take up the gifts at the proper time (Steve had asked two habited Sisters if they wouldn't mind bringing up the gifts, both of whom agreed), and preparing said gifts.

The unfortunate thing about preparing the gifts was that he would miss a good chunk of the homily…

But he was able to catch the tail end, which made missing most of it worth it to an extent, as Father Patterson had a habit of summarizing what he had been talking about.

"…Brothers and Sisters, the journey to Heaven is not an easy one, as I'm sure many of you know. The Saints that we celebrate this All Saints Day didn't just walk into the Pearly Gates without the Cross. No, they all suffered. Some at the hands of their friends and family, some at the hands of their enemies, and some at the hands of demons. But they all kept their eyes on the Crucifix, on the Corpus that hung on the wood and allowed themselves to be crucified with Him, knowing that after every Good Friday is an Easter Sunday.

"I encourage you all to meditate on what Heaven truly is – a place where everyone rejoices over the salvation of one soul and loves them in a way that no one can truly describe in words – but also to meditate on what Hell is. I don't think we do this enough. Hell is not just a curse that one should throw around willy-nilly like a ribbon. Many great saints who had visions of Hell described it as a place where all that exists is hatred, for oneself, for God, for your fellow man regardless of if they tried to save you or damn you, and where everyone there hates you with the same ferocity. May your meditations lead you to conversion of heart and a firm desire to never sin again. Amen."

Steve pulled out a small notebook from his pocket and quickly jotted down a few things to ponder later that evening when he had some quiet time from Father Patterson's homily, smiling as he returned it to his pocket. It had been a long time since he had heard a homily about Heaven and Hell…it was refreshing to hear those doctrinal truths once more.

* * *

The Avengers seemed to have figured out a pattern as the week went by, figuring that it wasn't a good idea to leave Steve and Natalia alone at the hospital. Particularly since they were all worried about Natalia and wanted to be with her when she finally woke up.

So, Sam was usually there in the morning, keeping Nat company while Steve was at Mass. Wanda would follow shortly after, bringing breakfast for the little group.

Thor would join them later in the afternoon, trading out with Sam, who would go back to watch Nathaniel.

In the evening, Thor and Wanda would leave as Clint and Laura would visit. These visits were the most comfortable for Steve, as he didn't have to hide how deep his anxieties ran and his affection for Natalia. And he was able to call her by her real name.

All of the other Avengers called Natalia "Natasha", and after calling her by her birth name for so long, Steve just couldn't adjust back to that. So he settled for calling her Nat around the others, and was thankful when he got a few hours with the Bartons where he could call her Natalia.

However, those visits didn't last very long, as they would only come in, update Steve and Nat on what was going on with the three horses and the three children, and then have to leave for the night so they could sleep and start the whole day over again in the morning. And Steve understood this, their kids came first, so he treasured the moments that he could spend saying Natalia's name and being more of the self that he had become so used to being over these past two years.

But once they left, the Super Soldier always felt dreadfully alone, with no other visitors and a silent Natalia…the quiet was almost suffocating.

Until one night when someone else decided to join him in his silent vigil.

Steve had been in the middle of praying his rosary, eyes closed, head lolled back against the back of the chair, fingers moving the beads in his hands as he prayed silently for the woman beside him, when the click of the door opening rattled through the quiet.

Jumping to his feet, he turned to face the newcomer, noting that the nurse wasn't due back for another round for another thirty minutes, the Doctor wouldn't be stopping by until after that, and housekeeping had come and gone long before the Bartons came to visit. None of the personal should have been alerted to anything from this room, as none of Natalia's monitors were showing anything out of the ordinary…

So…

As he faced the newcomer, he relaxed.

It wasn't an intruder.

"Sorry," Bruce Banner said softly, noting the Super Soldier's defensive positioning in front of Natalia. "I thought you were asleep."

Steve chuckled, relaxing his defensive posture with a smile, and gestured for the other man to enter. "No worries, Bruce. Come in."

The man's steps were cautious, though about what, Steve couldn't say. Bruce sat down opposite Steve, on Natalia's left side, while Steve resumed his position on her right.

There was a long silence, and Steve pulled back out his rosary, intent on finishing the last two decades if Bruce didn't have anything immediate to say. Closing his eyes, he picked up with the third mystery of the Sorrowful Mysteries.

The Super Soldier was so focused on beads in his fingers and the prayers that accompanied them, that he didn't notice Bruce's shifting in his chair or the eyes that were focused on him. By the end of the fifth decade, though, the eyes focused on him were so intense that Steve could feel them as if they were lasers burrowing into his skin. Calmly, he finished his prayers, crossed himself, and put his rosary away before opening his eyes and turning to face Bruce.

Bruce was studying him, his brown eyes searching Steve's face. He lifted a questioning eyebrow before speaking. "I didn't know you were Catholic."

And the rancher couldn't help but chuckle. "Yeah. I was raised in it and fell away from it after my time in the ice." He frowned slightly. "I did my best to go to Mass every week and attend confession…but besides that, I wasn't really practicing."

The brunette continued to study Steve, but the rancher couldn't read just what was going on in the man's head.

"What changed?" Bruce finally asked.

Steve gave a short, almost painful laugh. Father Patterson had asked that same question a week prior and he was wondering for just how long that question would haunt him. "A lot of things: Ultron, the Accords, the hiding, running, lying, Thanos…" He trailed off. "I guess, one day I just woke up and realized that I couldn't do everything by myself anymore."

Bruce gave him an odd look, but nodded, understanding a bit of what he meant. "Does it help? Having faith?"

Steve turned completely in his chair so he could face the man, and the woman who lay between them, fully. "Yes," He replied, his blue eyes full of conviction. "Believing in something bigger than myself, and knowing that He's in control, not me, puts my mind at ease. The world isn't on my shoulders, it's in His hands, and that is an enormous comfort."

The scientist lifted an eyebrow at that.

"I worried and fretted over the world for so long," Steve continued, not really sure why, but thinking that maybe this is what the other man needed to hear. "That I forgot to trust. With everything that went wrong, every failed mission, every injured teammate, I fell further and further into an increasingly darker place. Eventually, it became suffocating. Being on the run didn't help…and one day I found myself in Paris…and at the steps of the Cathedral Notre Dame de Paris. And thought, why not." He tilted his head a bit. "Have you ever been to that Cathedral?"

Bruce shook his head.

"It's beautiful, and enormous. I felt so…small and normal for a change. And frighteningly insignificant." He looked down at his hands. "I found myself walking down the aisle. There wasn't a Mass going on, but there were still people praying in the pews. The last time I had been in a church had been Peggy's funeral." He swallowed thickly for a moment. "I looked up, and there's the high altar. The altar itself is rectangular and long, but behind it is this huge gold plated tabernacle with a carving of Jesus' burial in the tomb…and just above it, is this life sized statue of Jesus and his mother. His dead body is limp in her lap as she looks up to heaven with these eyes that are so mournful…and all I saw was myself."

The memory flooded his vision and he was no longer in the hospital room, no longer talking to Bruce, no longer sitting next to Natalia. Rather, he was kneeling at that altar, crying out to God because he _failed and just couldn't keep doing this anymore._

 _I didn't want you to be alone…_

After a few moments, he found himself blinking back to the here and now, and found that Bruce was still staring at him.

Feeling warm tears track down his cheeks, he rubbed his eyes, somewhat embarrassed about his show of weakness. "And after that, I just…fell back into old habits. It was as if I'd never left my faith."

Neither man spoke for a long moment, Steve collecting himself and Bruce studying the man before him. The silence was almost deafening, save for the beeps of the machines hooked up to Natalia's sleeping form.

"Have you found peace, Bruce?" Steve asked, suddenly, startling the other man from his thoughts.

Bruce smiled, but there was an edge to it, a self-loathing edge. "I don't deserve peace."

Steve lifted an eyebrow. "Peace isn't something you deserve or earn. It's something you find."

The other man pursed his lips. "Then no, I haven't found it. And I highly doubt I ever will."

This made the super soldier frown. "Why don't you want to be happy?"

Bruce growled at that. "So this is about happiness, now?" He snapped. "Because every time I find a place where I think I might be happy, where I could be happy, something happens. Someone steps in and irritates the Other Guy, or blows something up, or tries to recruit me for some massive 'never gonna work' project and I can't go back!"

By the end of his speech, Bruce was on his feet, hands gripping hard on the bed rails of Natalia's hospital bed, and glowering at Steve with an expression that the Super Soldier deciphers as a mix of the self-loathing from before, a desire to run, and a desire to break something.

Steve stared right back at the man with a look as calm as water cutting across a stone, though his heart is thumping hard in his chest and ears. _Nat's in danger. Calm him down._

"What did he take from you, Bruce?" He asked, his voice as calm as his expression.

"Everything," Bruce replied in a hushed tone, leaning back on his heels, head drooping as if a huge weight had fallen from the sky solely on his back. "The life I had, the safety I once felt, my mortality, the one I—" He cut himself off, sinking back into his chair, a pained expression taking over his features.

And Steve knew that look. He had seen it so many times on the faces of soldiers who had gotten "Dear John" letters and recalled it on his own features after he awoke from the ice.

"The one you love." It wasn't a question.

Bruce's pained eyes met Steve's calm ones, somewhat surprised. "How…?"

"The ice took that from me, too." He replied, simply, but not patronizingly. "Is she still alive?"

The scientist blinked. "Y-yes…but I don't thin—"

"How long has it been since you've seen her?"

Another blink. "Years."

Steve nodded, pursing his lips. "Have you called her? You clearly love her very much."

Bruce just stared openly at Steve, as if he didn't really comprehend what the other man was saying.

And, honestly, Steve wasn't sure what exactly he was doing, either. The last time Steve had seen Bruce Banner, the scientist had been pining for Nat, and Bruce's answer of "years" since he had seen this woman he was in love with was just vague enough that he could be referring to Natalia.

And that hurt.

But they were all grownups. If Natalia wanted to go with Bruce, Steve wouldn't stop her.

He hadn't before, and he wouldn't now.

"And I don't think," Steve continued, resting his chin on his fist. "That I need to tell you again about how waiting too long isn't worth it."

Bruce blinked again, opening his mouth to speak, but was cut off by a groan coming from between the two men.

"Are you always this dramatic, Steve?" A voice croaked.

The man in question was on his feet before she finished, his blue eyes wide and focused on Natalia's face, his hands coming up of their own fruition to rest on her cheeks as her green eyes fluttered open to look at him, sparkling with the mischief that seldom left her. "Only," He replied, his voice breathy with a faint laugh-sob. "When I'm passionate about something."

The anxiety that had built up in his stomach over the past two weeks finally untangled. _She's awake! She's awake!_

"Then that must be all the damn time." She bantered back, her eyes sparkling for a moment before her face crumpled in pain. "Why does everything hurt?"

Again, the super soldier was in motion, his right hand sliding off her face to reach beside him and slap the nurse call light. One of her hands reached up quickly and gripped his left hand hard before he could move it, hissing in pain as she did so.

"Don't go!" She whispered, pain and anxiety filling those once playful green eyes. "Don't leave me."

"Я не пойду, Наталья." (3) He whispered back in broken Russian before switching back to English, his thumb brushing across her cheek gently. "I'm here. I'm with you."

The tempest building in her eyes calmed under his steady gaze and his gentle touch.

Forgetting that they might have an audience, Steve leaned forward and pressed a kiss to her forehead like he always had when she suffered from a nightmare.

But the nightmare was over. She was awake. She was finally awake.

The moment was short-lived as a nurse came in and walked with hurried steps towards Natalia, forcing Steve to move out of her way, his hand dropping from her face regretfully. But he never left her field of vision, a silent sentry watching over her.

When he did finally remember that Bruce had been in the room prior to her waking, he looked over at the other side of the room to find only an empty chair.

* * *

A/N:

(1) Tabernacle: a safe, usually plated in gold/precious metal/gems that stores the consecrated Body of Christ

(2) Sacristy: a room just off of the altar where the priest is and vessels are prepared prior to and after the Mass.

(3) "I will not go, Natalia."

Note: Russian is not a language that Steve is familiar with, but after living with Natalia for two years on the Ranch, I'm assuming that he may have picked up a few words, even if he is not good at it.

I hope you enjoyed! Please leave a review if you like.

Until the next chapter (which will occur several weeks in the story's timeline from this one)!

~Rachel


	9. Chapter 8

A/N: Oh good golly! This chapter took so long to write...and it's pretty long too!

I would have divided it into two parts, but I owe you guys for being so patient with me.

Reviews:

TheJollyRoger: You know, I'm not really sure why Tony is so upset. I'm pegging it on the possibility that something troubling happened to him in Infinity war, but since I don't have that information, I'm really grasping at straws. Frankly, I think both Cap and Tony messed up in Civil War in that a lot of issues could have been resolved easier if they had just been honest with each other, and I hope that the two of them do get that closer.

Guest/TheJollyRoger/Bree/BloodyNib: Thank you so very much for your kind words about Chapter 7 pt 2. I struggled with that chapter because of how personal it was to me, and seeing such a positive response really encouraged me. I cannot thank you all enough and I truly hope that I can provide that quality for you in the rest of this story.

Enough of my blabbing!

On to the story!

Note: If Natalia's name is Natasha in a section, it's because it's not Clint, Laura, Steve or Nat's POV.

Note 2: This chapter was inspired by Shut Up and Dance by Walk the Moon. Check it out!

Note 3: I OWN NOTHING!

Warning: LANGUAGE, and Drinking Alcoholic beverages

* * *

 **Shut Up and Dance**

 _December 1_ _st_

Natalia's journey through recovery was far from easy. After being evaluated for any brain injuries (of which none were found) the full treatment for her burns came into play. She spent so much time laying on her stomach that she was sure her neck would be stiff for a month. (1)

And that wasn't too far from the truth. Granted, the lack of movement she could get away with from her back did increase the stiffness of her neck and shoulder muscles.

Frankly, the whole process was too painful for her to dwell on and she was pretty sure she would never truly forget all of this.

Not that every moment was bad or anything…especially considering that Steve rarely left her side and held her hand through the pain.

So when she was finally discharged, she couldn't have been happier to accept the blessing of being free of the cold, too-clean smelling building, and finally go _home._

 _Home…_ She thought as she walked up the steps of the Ranch House, bundled in a warm jacket and hat as tiny, white snowflakes danced in her vision. _When did this house become home?_

 _Since the moment Steve brought you here._ A little voice whispered in the back of her head. A little voice she was sure she would never hear again.

 _Little Natalia…_

The girl that the Red Room swore they had killed. The one _she_ had sworn they had killed.

Stopping in her tracks, Natalia blinking several times, confused and shocked. Those monsters had killed that little girl…the one that they transformed into the Black Widow…right?

"Natalia?" A gentle, deep voice asked in her ear, quietly like he was whispering a secret. "Are you alright?"

She blinked up at Steve, their faces very close, noses red from the cold almost touching, breath visible from the dropping temperature filling the space between them. "Yes. I'm…" She wasn't sure what exactly she was, but she felt so warm…and not the bad kind of heat. The warmth of being…safe. Not the heat of the fire that seared her skin. "…Home." She finally finished.

He smiled, tilting his head and pressing a warm kiss to her forehead – an action that he did more frequently ever since she had awoken from her trauma induced sleep in the hospital. "Yes, you are." He pulled away, opening the door of the ranch house. "Welcome home, Natalia."

Ever the gentleman, he held the door open for her as she walked into the warm house. It was so different from the stark white and too-clean smelling hospital that had been her conscious and unconscious inpatient or outpatient residence for exactly 44 days, 12 hours, and 25 minutes. She took a deep breath of the new/old smell as Steve dropped the duffel bag he carried by the stairs to be fiddled with later.

Tony had brought said bag for them earlier that day, knowing that she was to be formally discharged from treatments, as most of her burns had cleared up, save for a few spots that were much slower to heal. The billionaire had said that everyone would be waiting for them, and for them to be ready for anything…so needless to say, both the soldier and spy were a bit on edge.

"Where is everyone?" Natalia asked, raising an eyebrow, searching the hall with her eyes, looking for anything out of the ordinary. "I thought that Stark said they would be here to greet us…"

Steve shrugged, assisting her in taking of her coat and hanging it on the coat hooks by the door. "Maybe they're in the back?" He suggested. Tony had been pretty cryptic and the others hadn't said a word about what was going on. So they were equally clueless.

And to Natalia, that was bad territory.

"I guess we could start there." She replied, smoothing down the sleeves of her turtle necked sweater. It hid the bandages on her back and shoulders very well, but normal shirts still felt odd on her. She had not been able to wear one for weeks after waking up as the burns were too extensive for constrictive clothing. Fortunately, the care team had allowed her to wear pants as a compromise for her wearing the airy hospital gown.

Unfortunately, it would be a good week or so before she could wear bras again… and she was grateful that the bandages that wrapped around her acted as support. (Not that Steve was looking or anything. Just, after two years of no missions that required she to take off a bra…it was weird to suddenly not be able to wear one.)

Pushing those thoughts aside, Natalia followed Steve as he walked towards the back of the house. The fleshy part of his palm was visible to her, smooth and scar-free, not marred by flames or anything of the sort, a fact that she had learned from Clint shortly after waking up.

" _He held up the barn as I ran in. Pretty sure the beam was on fire, but neither of us really cared at the moment since all that mattered was getting you out. Later, I found him on the porch with scorched red hands, and by the time we reached the hospital, the nurse declared them to be the same degree as sunburn."_

Only once before had Natalia been more thankful for the Super Soldier Serum that flowed in Steve's veins, and that had been during their ordeal with the Winter Soldier. The fact that he had not suffered for very long with the burns was an immense comfort.

She, on the other hand, deserved to burn. Deserved every minute of agony.

She never vocalized it to Steve, Clint, or anyone who saw her. But…in her mind, she found this to be a fitting punishment, especially for all the blood she had spilt in direct and crossfire. She deserved to burn, so much so that she refused the Cradle when the treatment was offered to her.

" _I would like my body to heal on its own, Dr. Cho. I appreciate the offer, but the creams and grafts will be just fine. If I hadn't been an Avenger, that treatment wouldn't be open to me, and there are at least three other patients on this floor alone that, due to their burns, are in more need of that Cradle than I."_

She gladly accepted every painful hour, and would continue to do so until she was fully healed or when this God that Steve believed in deemed she had made up enough.

She was interrupted in her musings by running into Steve's towering back. The man had stopped suddenly before the door to the back of the house. Unsure of what had stopped him, she rested a hand on his shoulder. "Steve?"

The man's shoulders shuddered under her fingers. "Stark," He finally said, his vocal cords strained. "You son of a bitch."

"Why Captain," Stark's voice cut in, surprising Natalia, who moved to Cap's side to see just what…and froze.

Tony stood just beyond the steps to the backyard…in between the Ranch House and the barn.

A bright red barn. The barn that had burned…

"I believe that is a bad language word!" Tony continued, a large smile smirk on his face.

Steve pressed a fist to his mouth, fighting back the flood of emotions that roiled off of his stiff form. And Natalia could understand.

Seeing the barn – whole, bright, and not a crumbled pile of ash to rebuild – was overwhelming.

"Be nice to the poor man, Tony." A woman's voice piped up, and Natalia turned to see Pepper Potts appear out of (seemingly) nowhere. "He and Natasha have gone through quite a lot over the past month and a half."

Tony wrapped an arm around the strawberry blonde. "I guess I'll let it slide," He smiled. "So, what do you think, Capsicle?"

Steve opened his mouth several times, but no words would come out. His hands fluttered in front of him, making incoherent, small gestures, before he turned to look at Natasha and placed a hand on her arm, tapping out something in Morse code.

"It's wonderful," Natalia translated for Tony and Pepper. "Thank you, so much, Tony."

"My my, Cap," Tony smirked. "When did you start sounding like Natashalie?"

Before Steve could respond, the red haired woman in question stuck out her tongue in the billionaire's direction. The soldier frowned a bit, clearing his throat, hoping he would be able to say something the next time he needed to speak.

Natalia slipped her hand into his, smiling up at him and nodding towards Tony. The soldier blinked, his fingers naturally intertwining with hers and his shoulders straightening before he nodded.

She smiled as Tony explained that this wasn't just a gift from him, but rather that the whole team had pitched in to help rebuild the barn. The billionaire went on to explain who had done what as they walked around the outside of the barn of their tour.

The general layout of the outside was very similar to Steve's original design. Though, there were three key differences: firstly, that there were multiple ways to enter the barn – each stall having its own door to the outside and two doors to the main hallway in the center of the barn, secondly, that there was a machine outside the barn that would allow Steve to wrap the hay bales, preventing loss of feed in the case of a fire or flood. And lastly, there were more ground rods attached to the lightning rod.

Natalia's fingers tightened around Steve's just a bit. This was good. This was very good.

* * *

"Alright," Tony announced, coming to a stop in front of the main entrance of the barn, a devious smile growing across his features. "Before we show you the inside, we'll need to blindfold you both."

The cautious looks that flooded both Steve and Natasha's faces were so similar that the billionaire almost burst out laughing and fought the temptation to pull out his phone and take a picture. _Now they are mimicking each other's expressions! This is just great!_

"There are no fireworks," Pepper cut in, hoping to ease the pair's worries. "Or explosives, or robots, or wormholes, or shenanigans."

"Well…maybe some shenanigans." Tony corrected, ignoring the glare from the strawberry blonde beside him.

Steve and Natasha blinked in unison and Tony almost lost it. The red head bit her lip and looked up at the blonde, meeting the soldier's gaze who seemed uneasy. Their silent communication was something that Tony had seen long before they came out here. He concluded that it had everything to do with them being partners while S.H.I.E.L.D. had still been around.

Though to see it in action again…it was an interesting thing to watch.

"Alright." Steve finally said with a sigh, turning to look at their friends.

"Great!" The billionaire reach out quickly and yanked the super soldier away from the super spy as Pepper did the reverse, pulling the pair from their mutual grip on each other.

"Nat!" Steve called out, panic drenching his voice, his eyes wild.

"Chill, Stevie. She'll be right back. We just have to take a detour." Tony noticed that his words didn't ease the tension out of his friend, but the super soldier didn't fight back, so Tony took that as a win.

Steve didn't get a chance to see where Pepper was taking Natasha before the billionaire covered his eyes with a thick, blue cloth. The soldier bit his lip hard and allowed the other man to lead him.

"Chill out, Capsicle." Tony groaned in frustration, leading Steve's stiff self towards the barn. "It'll just be a few minutes."

"If I'm a Capsicle," Steve deadpanned. "Then I think that I'd be the definition of chilled out."

The billionaire stopped and stared at the soldier for a long minute, before covering his face with his hands. "Dammit. Natashalie taught you how to be funny…The world is _Ending_!"

Steve couldn't help but laugh at that, the tension finally easing from his shoulders.

The brunette took this as a good sign and brought Steve into a side room inside the barn. "Alright, Mr. Funny Bone, take off the old man shirt."

The tension was almost immediately back. "Why?"

"It's a surprise, Captain."

Steve groaned. "How do I know you aren't making me the fool and that there are more than just you and I in this room?"

"Seriously?" Tony asked, hurt. "Can't you hear a heartbeat and breathing down the hall if you wanted to? You're getting rusty in your old age, Capsicle."

The rancher didn't reply to that, but instead turned his head from side to side, listening carefully.

Tony knew there was no one besides himself here, and he wasn't going to take a picture of Steve taking off his shirt because he'd already done that years ago. So it didn't matter worth a damn if he did it again because it wasn't blackmail worthy.

After a moment, the rancher raised his hands to the buttons of his shirt and deftly took it off, revealing the wife beater he wore beneath it. Tony snatched the shirt out of the other man's hands and tossed another shirt his way. A soft, fine thread count, slim fit dress shirt. "Put that on. Chop. Chop."

Steve caught the shirt with ease and slipped it on. "Tuck in or no?"

"Hmmm…" The slightly shorter man pondered for a moment. "Tuck in. And roll your sleeves up to just before the elbows."

The blonde shrugged and did as he was told.

As soon as he finished, Tony grabbed the man's arm and pulled him off again into another area of the barn, the main part. It was silent in there for a long moment, before a soft knicker came from their left.

Steve immediately turned to face the horse's voice. "Hey there, Boots," He called out. "You doing alright, buddy?"

The colt huffed and the rancher laughed.

Tony blinked, bringing the two of them to a halt. "When did you learn to speak horse?" He asked, letting go of Steve's arm.

"I didn't," The blonde replied, shoving his hands into his pockets. "I just know Lieutenant, Tatiana, and Boots' voices."

At the sound of their names, each horse perked their ears in the direction of the Captain and whinnied a greeting.

The man smiled. "I've missed you guys, too."

A chuckle joined the whinnies. "I hope they missed me, also." Natasha's voice echoed through the barn.

Tony turned to look, while Steve could only turn in the direction of her voice, and the brunette found himself smirking deviously at what he saw.

Pepper had done a great job.

* * *

"Stop fidgeting, Natasha! I'm almost done."

"You said that two minutes ago. And you're still prodding at me." The blindfolded woman huffed, but held as still as she could.

Pepper had somehow managed to get her out of her turtle neck/jean combo and into a soft, knee length dress with stiffer cap sleeves and a collar that covered the back of her neck. It fell to her knees and flared at the hips and had a just pushing modest neck line, but besides that, Natalia lacked details.

A dangerous situation for the former spy.

"What's going on?" She asked for the fifth time, getting frustrated with not knowing.

"Come on, Natasha. It's a surprise! Go with it for once." Pepper replied, placing a cool metal necklace around Natalia's neck and earrings in her ears.

 _When did it become so hard to get information from people?_

"And…there!" The strawberry blonde said triumphantly. "All done!"

Natalia stood, the dress swishing around her, and placed her hands on her hips. "Can we go now?"

"So impatient to get back to Rogers, hm?" Pepper sighed, but grabbed the smaller woman's wrist and gently led her into another room…one where Natalia could hear her horses whinny.

"I missed you guys, too." She heard her Captain say, and couldn't help but chuckle in relief at knowing they were once again in the same room.

"I hope they missed me, also." She called out.

There was a shifting sound, as if several feet all around her had moved…and she was sure Steve's hearing had picked up on the fact that it wasn't just the four of them in this room.

"Okay," Stark began. "Now that we are all together again…"

Suddenly, the blindfold was pulled from Natalia's eyes, soft light flooding into them as she blinked and took in the sight around her.

The barn building itself didn't look much different on the inside than before…save for the wood decorations lacking Steve's touch (a detail she was sure the rancher would remedy as soon as he was able). But what truly caught her eye was the group of people standing in the space. She spotted Sam, Wanda, Vision, Thor, Clint and Laura, but there were others too. Ant-Man and The Wasp, Rhodes, Bruce, two women she didn't recognize…

Old Avengers. New Avengers.

Her _friends._

"Welcome home!" They chorused, and music began to play from somewhere.

A party. Stark had planned a party.

A Christmas party from the looks of how everyone was dressed and the decorations that hung from the walls and stalls. All three horses were accounted for and-

"Aunty Nat! Aunty Nat!" A young female voice called out, and Natalia had just enough time to turn and open her arms before Lila crashed into her. "You're home!"

Natalia could not help but smile as she wrapped her arms around the girl. "I'm glad to see you too, Lila." She ran a hand through the girl's hair and looked around. "Where are your brothers? Don't they want to hug their aunt?"

"They're with Uncle Steve." Lila replied, giggling.

And when Natalia finally spotted her partner, she understood her niece's laughter.

Cooper had pounced onto Steve's back in a tackle while Nathaniel had both of his arms wrapped around the Super Soldier's legs. Both were attempting to drive Steve to the ground, and the blonde was certainly giving them a run for their money.

"Cooper!" She called out, looking displeased for a moment before the edges of her mouth turned up in a devious smile. "Left side rib, under the armpit."

"Nat!" Steve whined in jest. "Not helping!"

"There will be _no_ wrestling at this party." Laura's voice cut through the barn, the stern mom tone coming out before her son could do what his aunt instructed him to do.

"Aw…" Nathaniel pouted.

"But mom!" The older Barton boy whined.

"No 'but mom'. Off, Cooper."

Sighing, the brunette child slid off his uncle's back while the younger boy let go of his legs. The younger brother held up his arms, a silent plea to be picked up.

Steve smiled down at the boy and complied, resting him on his hip while fixing the boy's hair with his other hand. His mouth moved, and Natalia couldn't pick up what he was saying…however she recognized the look he was giving both Nathaniel and Cooper.

 _A dad teaching his kids how to ride a bike._

And it struck her, again, just how good Steve would be as a dad.

"Aunty Nat?" Lila's voice cut through her thoughts before they could continue any further. "Are you feeling better?"

Natalia looked down at the girl, her brown eyes boring into her face, and she smiled at those warm eyes. "Much better."

"Glad to hear it," A gruff voice said from behind her. "You never did like being down for very long."

The former spy had heard something from behind her before the voice spoke, but had let it be, seeing as there were Avengers here and they wouldn't let in anyone who would hurt another one on their team she assumed it was a friendly. She was right. She turned slowly. "Hi, Nick," She replied, letting her niece go and looking fully at the former director. "You look well."

"As do you," Nick Fury countered, giving her a slight smile. "So, how are you and Rogers doing out here?"

Natalia shooed Lila, sending her to go hang out with her brothers before lifting an eyebrow at the older spy. "Am I right in assuming that you already know?"

The eyepatch wearing spy shrugged. "I don't keep tabs on everyone all the time. Once a month check-ins and yearly evals are enough. After everything the two of you have done, you deserve some privacy."

"Then you'd know we are doing just fine out here."

Nick smiled. "But are you happy with the life he's provided for you?"

Natalia kept her features schooled as she pondered an answer to that question.

 _Am I happy?_

Many people had provided lifestyles for Natalia over the years. The Red Room, the KGB, S.H.I.E.L.D., the Avengers…they all had provided for her and built a particular lifestyle for her to fit into each time.

But this…this was different, right?

 _No more ledger, no more missions full of death and panic…but I'm not bored. Each day is something new and different…almost normal. For once, it doesn't matter who I was, all that matters here is who I am now._

 _And that does make me happy._

"Yes," She replied after a moment. "I am happy."

Nick gave her a familiar smile, one that the younger spy had only seen once before…back right after Banner had left.

And the same question she had voiced then crawled out of her mouth. "Did you know this would happen? Is this why you partnered us all those years ago?"

The eyepatch-wearing man chuckled, shaking his head. "I can't predict the future, Romanoff."

"But you pushed us together for a reason," she pressed, crossing her arms, eyes narrowed. "Why?"

Nick Fury's good eye sparkled a bit. "He needed a reason to keep living and you needed a mission to wipe the red from your ledger."

The former Black Widow barely stopped her eyes from widening, but there must have been some kind of expression on her face, because the older man stepped forward and wrapped her in a fatherly hug. "Take good care of our Soldier," He said, patting her shoulder as he pulled away. "I know he'll take good care of you."

* * *

Eventually Cooper, Lila, and Nathaniel were sent to bed, and Nick decided he would keep his eye on them so the adults could enjoy the rest of the party. Sam, who moved to man the music with F.R.I.D.A.Y. feeding him an enormous selection, picked out some upbeat, club songs.

Slowly, but surely, the middle space of the barn was filled with Avengers—both new and old, spies and former spies.

Steve opted to let Lieutenant, Tatiana and Boots out of the barn, leaving the doors to their stalls open so they could come and go as they pleased. It was then that the rancher noticed that Tony must have had some sort of insulation installed that would keep the heat in the barn even if the doors were open to the cold air, and he wondered if it would do the opposite in the summer. He pushed that thought back to ask the billionaire later.

Once the soldier-turned-rancher was done, he brushed off his hands and leaned against Lieutenant's stall door, smiling towards the impromptu dance floor.

Namely at Natalia.

Her red hair was short now (due to the fire) and curled around her ears, leaving her neck exposed, save for the red, decorative scarf she wore to hide the burn bandages he knew were there. He glanced at his watch to make sure it wasn't time to change said bandages or for her antibiotics—nope. Two more hours—before looking back at her, drinking in the happiness that beamed from her face as she danced with their friends.

"Looks like they are having a lot of fun out there, huh, Captain?" A voice said suddenly.

A bit startled, Steve stood ramrod straight, muscles bunching under the blue colored shirt he wore, to face Maria Hill. He blinked and relaxed. "Yes, they certainly are."

She smiled brightly at him, taking a sip of her drink. "Why don't you join them?"

"I could ask you the same question," Steve countered.

The young brunette laughed. "I just left that mob. My feet could use a break." She gave him a look. "You deflected."

Sighing, the rancher uncrossed his arms, shoving his hands once more into his pockets. "I…don't dance. Not like people these days do. It's all…weird to me."

Maria nodded, understandingly. "I'm sure she could give you some pointers," she added, gesturing towards the red head who was now dancing with Pepper to the hip hop beat.

Steve shrugged. "Maybe later."

The spy patted his shoulder, lightly. "Just enjoy yourself, Cap. This is a party for you and Natasha, after all."

"I will," He replied, smiling and praying that it didn't look fake.

She must have been convinced or decided to leave it be, because she returned the smile and joined Sam at the music table. Steve looked around once more and decided he would join Thor, who was currently at the fully stocked bar with Rhodes and Carol Danvers.

Steve's hearing picked up that Rhodey was trying to explain how to make a specific drink to Thor, who looked baffled by mixing different alcohols when one could just have Asgardian Meed. The War Machine was getting progressively more annoyed, so the rancher stepped in.

Moving from his place by the horse stall, Steve made his way over to the small bar and set his hands down on the counter behind it, smiling. "What can I getcha?"

And thus, the Super Soldier who couldn't get drunk became the bartender for the night.

* * *

A while later, Steve was drying off his hands and took a look at the dance floor. It had been a while since he had turned his eyes to that point of the room, since people noticed that Thor was no longer on bartender duty, and people could (finally) order the drinks that they wanted. Like iron to a magnate, Steve's blue eyes sought out a head of red hair…and found none on the dance floor.

With a shrug, Steve turned back to the sink to put the towel down, thinking that Natalia must have just left the dance floor and wanted to rest for a bit.

But when he turned back around, he found the former spy sitting before him on one of the bar stools, smiling widely. Her cheeks were flushed and her eyes sparkled similarly to how they would after a good sparring session.

He returned the smile. "Did ya have fun out there?"

"Yeah. Sam picked some good music." She lifted an eyebrow. "Having fun getting everyone else drunk?"

"Well, I haven't had anyone complain about my bartending skills or messing up their orders…so, yeah. It's been fun."

"Hm…" She tapped her chin with a delicate finger. "I guess you haven't been put to the test."

He lifted an eyebrow at her. "Alright, ma'am. What can I get you?"

Her grin turned devious. "Two of the finest festive vodka drinks you can think up off the top of your head without looking up how to make it."

"You got it." He replied with a smile before setting his mind to the task.

* * *

Steve had his back to Natalia as he prepared her drink, though she noticed a few of the ingredients he grabbed.

 _Chocolate syrup, Cherry Noir Vodka…is that Schnapps?_

Natalia almost rolled her eyes. Maybe she should have said a straight vodka drink…but where was the fun in that? And since he was on a roll…

Resting her chin on her hand, she leaned on the bar and watched him work. It wasn't hard to notice how the muscles of his back moved under the finely made dark blue fabric of his shirt. But before she could truly "appreciate the view," Steve turned around and placed two cocktail napkins before her before setting down two double old fashion glasses filled with a chocolate colored liquid within. She smiled at the touch of the peppermint cane, peaking out of the liquid almost like a straw.

"Two North Poles on the house." (2)

"Like you were charging to begin with." Natalia laughed.

"Probably should have," Steve mused with a shrug. "Considering how many times Rhodey and Tony have come over here."

"Hmm…" She replied, before wrapping her fingers around the closest glass. "Shall we?"

He picked up the other. "Твоё здоровье." (3) Steve toasted before taking a drink.

She followed his lead, smiling a bit. Of course his concern would be her health…

The drink was good, sweet, but definitely boozey. She was not disappointed. He had treated every ingredient with the respect it deserved.

"Well?" He asked after she put her glass down.

"It's good."

"But?"

"The Red Russian (4) will always be my favorite. You will never get me to like Schnapps as much as Vodka."

Steve threw back his head and laughed. "That wasn't the point!" He exclaimed just loud enough for her to hear.

She smiled, enjoying seeing him genuinely happy for once.

His laughter quieted down to chuckles just as the music took on a slower quality and the lights dimmed a bit. The two former Avengers looked at Sam before the blonde peered at his watch. "I guess it's time for last call."

Natalia lifted an eyebrow at him. "That late already?"

"It's almost one."

She nodded slowly as Steve announced last call.

No one seemed to mind his announcement as the guests paired off to slowly dance around the impromptu dance floor, leaving Natalia to watch and Steve to clean up the bar. He was quick and efficient, and after a few moments was sitting beside her on his own barstool.

"How are you feeling?" He asked after a bit, his blue eyes focused on the dance floor, fingers weaved together in his lap.

"Well, I'm not feeling like I got hit by a train," She started, that smile returning once more to her face. "And I'm glad none of my medications are 'do not mix with alcohol.'"

He smiled softly in return. "It's good that you are doing better."

The easy silence between them resumed, just sitting there between them like an old friend. Lounging comfortably, neither infringing upon the others internal thoughts nor causing discomfort.

This was one of the many things she enjoyed about being around Steve. His presences was soothing to her need to be active, calming her and allowing her to live in the moment. Something that she had lacked for years, she mused as she watched the couples sway and turn on the dance floor.

 _I wonder if he wants to be out there…_ Her mind wondered as her green eyes flicked over to look at her partner.

He was staring at the couples, his face neutral, but his eyes full of…something. Sadness?

Frowning a bit, she looked a bit longer, trying to figure out what was going on behind those blue eyes. She had seen that look before…but where?

 _Who's the girl?_

The memory hit her hard and she dropped her head. That's where she had seen this look. Back in the bunker before they had found Zola. Back when she didn't know of Steve's relationship with Margaret Carter, a fact that she knew now.

But would he still want to dance, even if it wasn't with the girl he promised one to?

Looking down at her hands, she decided to say something to fill the silence. "So, about—"

At the exact same moment, Steve started. "Would you—" He paused, turning to look at her, his blue eyes dropping the distant look to focus on her. "I'm sorry. You first."

 _Ever the gentleman._ She smiled. "I wasn't going to say anything important. Just about the weather. What were you going to say?"

He bit his lip, his fingers fidgeting as he took a deep breath. "Would you like to dance?"

She blinked at him. Part of her had not expected this, even though she had been wondering if he did wish to be out there. And Steve did surprise her from time to time. As she was looking for the right words to say, she took in his appearance.

His shoulders, usually so strong and confident, were slightly hunched. His hands, usually calm and steady, were nervously fiddling in his lap. His blue eyes were looking at her, but his countenance suggested that he was afraid…Afraid she would reject him outright.

She knew of his insecurities with women, it was one of the reasons why she had tried to set him up so many times. But this was something else.

A new glimpse into these insecurities.

"Yes," She said, finally, noting just how much his anxiety had increased in the thirty seconds it took her to respond. "I'd like that."

Relief ebbed off of him as he stood, his shoulders straightening, his hands steadying as he held one out to her. An old fashioned gentleman as always, and she found she didn't mind that, because it was Steve.

Natalia took the outstretched hand and let him guide her to the dance floor. A new song started over the speakers—a soft, smooth jazz tune—as Steve brought them to a stop and turned to face her. His cheeks turning a bit pink as he stood there for a moment.

Being his partner for as long as she had allowed her the ability to learn his tells. And all of Steve's were saying that he had no idea what he was doing, but that he wanted desperately to try.

Smiling gently, she took a step closer to him, pulling his right hand around her, placing it securely on the middle of her back—as he wouldn't be able to do a proper hold on her because of the burns—while she slipped her right into his left. Looking up at him, she placed her left hand on his right shoulder. "Don't think too much, Steve. Just listen to the rhythm and sway."

As she spoke, she started him off and, after a few moments, he took the lead. He relaxed into the hold, pulling her closer when other couples would move past them, but his hand never moved from the waist line, as if afraid to touch her more than necessary.

As the song neared its end, Natalia found herself wondering if he would do anything marking the end of the dance, or would he simply lead her back to a seat.

And as if Steve read her mind, he stepped out of their embrace, releasing her waist but not her hand, and twirled her under his arm before bowing over their joined hands as the last note rang out through the barn. His fringe covered his eyes for a moment before he stood straight once more.

"Thank you, Natalia." He said, a smile gracing his lips and his eyes filled with something she couldn't quite place. It looked like a combination of relief and acceptance.

"You're welcome, Steve."

* * *

A/N:

(1) In the case of an accident that involves a head injury and any other injury, the head injury takes primacy, even if it is over a burn.

(2) North Pole: it can be made two different ways, one with gin, the other with Vodka. I went with the vodka recipe that one can find. (if you are old enough to drink!)

(3) "To your health" informal

(4) Red Russian: Vodka with some red juice (usually cranberry, but can be cherry). I'm pretty sure this is the drink that Nat makes in AoU for Bruce and herself.

I hope you enjoyed this longer chapter. The next chapter will feature...

I'll try to have this next chapter up sooner!

Thanks again! Please leave a review if you like!

~Rachel


	10. Chapter 9

A/N:

OKAY! It has been way too long. And I'm so sorry. I really struggled with this chapter and wasn't able to publish this until today.

Just like with God Help the Outcasts, this chapter is pretty personal to me. And just like that chapter, if you have any questions about topics discussed, I'll be happy to answer in PM.

Reviews:

Bree: Thank you so much! Here it is!

TheJollyRoger: What kiss at the end...? Steve didn't kiss her...He bowed and smiled at her. Also, keep your shirt on. The story is marked as complete because these are interconnecting one shots. See chapter 1 in regards to that. ;)

Qweb: I'm so glad you like it! Yes the "talking" horses are a lot of fun to write and the dance was my favorite scene!

Guest: Thank you! Here is the update!

Enough blabbering from me!

Note: I own nothing.

This one shot was inspired by Locash's I Know Somebody. Check it out!

Warning: Discussion of the blood on Nat's hands. Nothing explicit.

* * *

 **I Know Somebody**

 _April (Four years after Infinity War)_

Sundays were a weird day for Natalia. For four full years, Steve and Sundays were a mystery.

She would wake up around six to an empty house with no sign of where her partner had gone, save for the truck they shared missing from the driveway. Prior to adopting the three horses, she would shrug it off and go to hang out with the Bartons. Then, after adopting them, she would go and be with Tatiana for a few hours, enjoying her company and brushing her down.

Then, when she would return to the house, she would find the truck back in the driveway and a fresh breakfast waiting for her on the kitchen table beside a vase full of flowers (usually wildflowers, though on certain occasions there would be carnations and on one occasion – Christmas if she recalled correctly – roses).

While she would sit down to eat, Steve would emerge from his room, dressed in his usual "old man" getup, but his hair was lightly gelled and styled.

" _Did you visit a lovely lady?" She asked one Sunday two years before._

" _Kinda," He replied smoothly, pouring himself a glass of orange juice. "I went to spend time with a Lady and a King."_

 _His cryptic answer had left her raising a brow._

" _I went to Mass," He admitted after a moment, caving into the look, as if he didn't want to hold up the ruse for very long…even if his blue eyes were afraid that she would mock him._

Back then, she had just nodded and let it be. She assumed that Mass was something that helped him, especially since his worst nightmares tended to be on Saturdays and Fridays, but after going to Mass, he would sleep calmly.

But today would be different.

She had set her alarm for 3 A.M., hoping that would be early enough.

And was pleased when she found she was right since, after her alarm went off, she heard the shower downstairs turn on. Smiling, she got out of bed and headed to her on-suite bathroom, where the clothes she had picked out last night waited for her.

Like the good spy she had once been, she did her research on this particular mission before committing to it. She had researched what the proper clothing to wear to a Catholic Mass was and had found the most modest dress she had in her closet (a soft, knee length green dress) to pair with a black cardigan and flats. She didn't wear dresses very often these days as there wasn't many times to do so, so it felt nice to wear the dress Laura had gotten her for Christmas the year before.

By the time she was heading down the stairs, Steve was standing by the door, swinging a suit jacket over his shoulders.

"Good morning, Steve," She called out, announcing her presence as her feet had silently made their way down the steps.

Steve's head shot up so fast she thought she heard a pop. His blue eyes widened as she made her way off the staircase. "Nat," He said, running his left hand through his hair. "H..Did I wake you?"

She chuckled, shaking her head. "No. I just…" She straightened her shoulders. "Could I join you for Mass?"

The blonde rancher's jaw slackened and if he wasn't so steady on his feet, she would have guessed he would have fallen over.

 _A+ for surprise._

"Uh…" He attempted to recover, closing his mouth and clearing his throat. His voice was calm but defaulted, and his eyes were shining with something she couldn't quite pin. "Yes, of course."

She smiled broadly. "Great."

At that moment, the clock struck 3:30AM.

"We better go."

* * *

Steve felt like a supernova was going off in his chest as he focused his attention on the road.

Ever since last November, after Natalia opened her green eyes from her trauma induced sleep, Steve had wished that she would join him for Mass, even just once.

 _And here she was._ Sitting quietly in the passenger seat, staring out the window at the woods they passed by. Her green eyes looking far away whenever he glanced her way.

The silence in the truck was comfortable, at least it was for the former soldier, who was used to this drive being a silent and long one. He usually spent this time preparing for Mass and he did have a lot of time to ponder things.

But right now, he was distracted by the redhead sitting next to him.

"I did some research," Natalia said about an hour into the drive, startling Steve out of his musings. "On Catholic Masses. But I think you would be a more reliable source of information."

The formal tone and language she used told Steve two things: she was nervous and curious. "Okay," He replied. "What do you want to know?"

And so for the next two hours, he answered all of her questions about the Mass, what language it would be in (Latin), what it was, why he went, why it was so important to him, etc.

He could hear the passion in his voice as he replied to her questions, and hoped that he was able to convey the importance of his Sunday outings to her.

Almost too soon, he pulled into the parking lot of the church, parked, and stepped out of the truck. As he moved his seat forward to grab his missal and book of prayers, he noticed that Nat hadn't moved from her spot in the truck, her eyes locked on the building before them. It wasn't a grandiose Cathedral, but rather a humble parish surrounded by a well-kept lawn and surrounded by a white fence. There were quite a few cars in the parking lot, even though Mass wasn't for another forty five minutes.

After a moment of watching her, Steve walked around and opened the passenger side door. "Ready?" He asked when her eyes finally moved to look at him. He smiled and held out his right hand to her, his left occupied by his prayer books.

She blinked at him, before undoing her seatbelt and taking his hand only to let it go after her feet touched the ground. She smoothed the front of her skirt and he turned and started walking towards the parish.

He held open the door for an older woman and gestured for Natalia to enter before him. Once they were both inside the vestibule of the church, he dipped his fingers into a small bowl of Holy Water and crossed himself. He let the silence of the church wash over him as he lead Natalia into the main church, his eyes focused on the lovely altar at the opposite side.

Their feet moved silently over the soft carpet and they soon came to the pew that he would typically sit in. Gesturing for her to sit first, he genuflected to the altar before sitting beside her. Steve put down the kneeler (knowing that it would support both of their weight if she wanted to kneel with him), knelt, and opened his prayer book, beginning his prayers before Mass.

* * *

Natalia was a master of languages. She was fluent in five known languages that she could easily slip into, and several more that would take a few minutes for her to adjust to.

Latin just happened to be one of the ones she was fluent in. (1) As a result, she found herself able to pay attention to the words from the altar that were audible, and only needed to look at Steve's missal for the responses and the prayers that she couldn't hear.

But it was the homily that had stuck with her.

The priest was a soft spoken man, but strong in his words. A master of words herself, she could truly appreciate the way he strung together his, like pearls to be worn around a lady's neck.

But it was the truth of those words that cut right to the heart. They refused to be ignored. Refused to be tossed aside like some worthless necklace from a onetime lover.

No. These words wormed their way past her defenses and into her heart.

The last reading was about the Prodigal Son (2), but the priest chose to focus most of his attention in his homily on the Father.

"The son knows that he's not worthy of his father's attention, not after demanding his inheritance, leaving his aged father to take care of the home with his elder brother, and then squander the money he has. He recognizes his faults and failings, that he is broken and damaged. And all he wants to do is to return to his father's home…not as his son, but as his slave. To pay his father back for his failings.

"And yet…the father waits for him. Can you imagine what his day must have been like? Looking down the road every day for his son? How many times do you think he saw someone coming up the road and jumped up, thinking 'Is that my son? Is that my little boy?'

"In our lives, we focus so much on the bad we've done and maybe we think to ourselves 'I'm too damaged to be healed,' or 'I'm not worthy to be a child of the King, so I'll settle for being his servant' or any other statements that presume that our sin is too great for God's mercy. That our past is too dark to be washed away in the blood of the Lamb and made white as snow.

"Firstly, if you are having these thoughts, I – as your pastor, as your brother in Christ – ask, beg you to stop. I've been down that road. It's a lonely path. Secondly, the flood waters of God's mercy are so deep, wide, and –most importantly—all encompassing." The priest pointed to the back of the church. "There is a little room back there. It's only about…4 feet by 2 feet by 6 feet. But the graces that flow in that small space can wipe away the darkest night, the deepest wounds, and the blackest of stains.

"If you are carrying that dark, deep baggage, it's time to lay it down. The Father is waiting to give you back your robe, your ring, your inheritance as a child of the King. Of being _His_. God bless you all."

And after the homily, Natalia found herself stuck to her spot, even after the Mass ended. Her green eyes focused on the metal box – _tabernacle_ , her mind corrected – as she sat there, her brain refusing to let her move and her eyes hurting from holding back tears.

A warm hand finally rested on her chilled one, making her turn to look.

And there was Steve's kind and worried blue eyes looking at her, and all she wanted to do was cling to him for dear life.

Because he had given her an out.

Sure, she had never put a lot of stock in God's existence, noting that if He did exist, He probably wouldn't want anything to do with her. On missions, part of her act had been to go to different houses of faith from time to time to blend in.

 _But none of them had ever said they could take the red away…_

Steve must have seen the cocktail of emotions flooding her green eyes and pulled her into a gentle hug –just like what she had done for him at Peggy's funeral— held her for as long as he could.

Eventually, he guided her out of the Church and back to their truck. She was so emotionally drained that she didn't protest Steve's assistance.

And he didn't complain when she slid across the bench seat to rest her head on his shoulder as he drove her home.

* * *

A few weeks passed before the topic of Mass came up again. Steve wasn't sure what to say in regards to it, but the look on Natalia's face when she was in deep thought suggested that she'd probably talk to him about it when she was ready. So he left her to her thoughts, his silent presence in those moments letting her know that he was there for her.

It was a Saturday when Natalia finally sought him out.

He was in his office, a charcoal pencil in his right hand and a canvas resting on the easel before him as he worked on a picture of Boots for Nathaniel's upcoming birthday. His brows were furrowed in concentration, a smudge of charcoal on his left cheek.

Natalia had been watching him for a good ten minutes from just out of his sight, wondering if she should interrupt or just wait until tomorrow morning to talk to him.

 _If you push this off again you'll never talk to him about it._ She reminded herself. And with a quiet sigh, decided that she needed to do this now while she still had the courage to do so.

She knocked gently, but loudly enough for him to hear, on the door frame.

"Come in, Nat." He called, his blue eyes not leaving the canvas as he smoothed some lines.

She did as he said, quietly sitting on the edge of his desk, being sure to steer clear of the other drawings and papers on his desk. She set her hands in her lap and looked at the drawing of Boots up close. The resemblance of the drawing to its subject was uncanny, and she almost expected it to whinny at her. "That's amazing." Her voice was soft as she gestured to the canvas.

The tips of his ears turned red and he rubbed the back of his neck, leaving trails of charcoal on his clear skin. "I hope it'll be good when it's done."

She pushed his shoulder gently, chuckling before turning her attention back to what she wanted to talk about. "Do you have a few minutes?"

He put down his pencil and leaned back in his chair, blue eyes meeting hers. "For you, I'd spare a few years if you asked me to."

She smiled a bit at that, before looking back at her hands. "I…um…first wanted to thank you f-for bringing me with you to Mass. It…it's really affected me. In a good way." She couldn't look into his blue eyes, part of her afraid that she would falter if she turned her head, even though she could feel his gaze on her face. "I never took stock in religion…I mean, I was raised by the KGB. Religion was pretty much forbidden. There was only the good of Russia.

"And in my life before the KGB…I don't know what's real. I could tell you what I know solely because history says it happened…multiple newspapers talking about the fire that took my parents, obituaries, etc...But I don't know if my family had any particular faith. Soviet Russia was not kind to faiths of all sorts. And I'm not sure where I'm going with this…" She interrupted herself, her fist making its way to press against her mouth, trying to gather the words she thought she wanted to say.

A warm hand rested on her other one, and she finally turned to look at her partner. His warm, deep blue eyes grounding her as her thoughts tumbled in turmoil.

"Records would have been non-existent or destroyed by the KGB if they found them. I-I don't know what my parents left for me to find or…" She trailed off once more, suddenly wondering what the hell she was doing.

Steve must have seen that in her eyes and stood, pressing a finger to her lips, his blue eyes swimming with something she had trouble deciphering.

 _When did he become tricky to read?_

"What are you really trying to say, Nat?" His voice was soft as he moved his hand from her mouth to her hair, tucking one of her red locks behind her ear. "You're talking in circles."

She took a deep breath, trying to ignore the warmth that followed in his hand's wake. "I want the red gone. M-my nightmares aren't as bad as they once were, and I guess I've paid my debt to society by bringing many of my former handlers to justice…but…"

"There's a restlessness inside of you that just refuses to go away." He finished when she didn't speak for a long moment.

Natalia nodded, her throat tightening a bit. "And up until a few weeks ago…I was convinced that was all I was going to get of wiping out the red. That it would fade to pink but never be fully gone. And now…because I don't know what my parents left for me…I don't know if I can…"

His arms wrapped around her lithe frame, pulling her into a gentle hug. She pressed her face into his shoulder, her fingers digging into the front of his shirt right over his beating heart.

"If you want, I'll talk to Father about this. I'm sure there are other ways to get you where you want to be." He rested a hand in her hair as he pressed a kiss to her temple. "I'll help you get there."

Her grip on him tightened, knowing he was always honest and kept his promises to her.

* * *

 _April (One year later)_

"Ready?" Steve asked, his blue eyes shining as he adjusted his suit jacket as they stood outside of the parish he had brought Natalia to several months before.

"As I'll ever be." Natalia replied, her hand slipping into his as they walked up the steps.

Clint stood by the door, smiling as they approached. He wore a suit similar to Steve's but his pocket square was pink, probably to match his daughter and wife's dresses. He leaned over and kissed Natalia's forehead as he opened the door for them. The former spies had had a long talk about this day months ago, and he had been very supportive of her choice the whole time.

And she couldn't have been more grateful.

Because tonight, tonight she would be fully initiated.

An exhaustive search for any baptismal records in the Russian Orthodox, Russian Catholic, and even some small Protestant churches in Russia had been for naught. If she had been baptized in her infancy, there was no proof to be found.

Fortunately, the priest had dealt with this type of situation before, and after he had a long talk with Natalia and several RCIA classes later, the former spy decided that becoming Catholic not only would take away the red, but was something she desired from the depths of her soul. She had seen the impact Steve's faith had on his life, especially in the past five years, but even before that in small ways, and she admired that faith. Wanted that.

And now it would be _hers._

In the vestibule, they were met by Josephine, an older woman who was Natalia's Sponsor. The older woman smiled broadly at their arrival and hugged her soon-to-be-Goddaughter. "The big day is finally here!" She said quietly. "Are you ready?"

Natalia's green eyes sparkled. "Yes." She nodded firmly.

"That's my girl." Josephine said, tapping the younger woman's cheek gently before turning to Steve. "Good evening, Steven. Ready?"

The blue eyed man smiled, shoving one hand into his pocket. "I think so, but I'm gonna need to talk to Father first." He reached out with one hand and squeezed Natalia's shoulder. "I'll see you both in a bit."

The women watched him go before turning back to each other.

"I have something for you." The older woman finally said, breaking the comfortable silence. She reached into her purse and pulled out a white box the size of a novel.

Natalia looked at the box, then to the woman. Part of her wanted to protest because the older woman had already given her the best gift she possibly could – an ear to listen and advice that was invaluable. But the red head knew that Josephine would hear none of that, so she accepted the gift.

Pulling off the ribbon, she opened the box and found herself looking at a green book with the Catholic coat of arms on the front and the words "Catechism of the Catholic Church" written in gold lettering.

"I know you still have a lot of questions about being Catholic, and," Josephine began. "You've already gone through mine looking for answers. Well, now you have one of your own…so whenever a pesky questions come back up, you only have to reach out for your own Catechism to find the answer."

Natalia wrapped the older woman in a hug. "Thank you, for everything." She whispered.

"You're most welcome, Goddaughter."

* * *

A/N: And that's a wrap for this chapter.

1) Iron Man 2

2) Luke 15:11-32

P.S: This homily was also from another one that I've heard in the past. I hope I was able to convey the importance the same way that the priest I heard it from had.

There are only two more chapters left to this story. But I promise I will tie up all loose ends by then.

Next time: Lieutenant is a sneaky stallion, and Steve decides to man up.

~Rachel


	11. Chapter 10

***Jumps out from nowhere***

 **Hi Everyone!**

 **Long time, no see! I'm sooooo sorry! I've been very busy this year...**

 **But now I've got some free time, and decided to sit down and continue on this journey with you guys! Now, I know I said I have 2 chapters left, and that is true, however they may end up being divided into two parts each. (So 4 chapters worth! YAY! This is my gift to you all for being so patient with me).**

 **Anyway! If you need to brush up on where in the story we are at, feel free to! This Chapter isn't going anywhere.**

 **And with that, I present to you Battleship (Pt. 1)**

 **Enjoy!  
**

Chapter inspired by Battleship by Daughtry.

This is a fan inspired story. I am not making any money off of this. All characters belong to their respective creators.

Warning: Some cursing ahead

* * *

 **Battleship**

"Well…" Steve said after a long moment. "I can't say this was expected..."

His blue eyes were locked on the veterinarian, Doctor Jonathan Thames, as he collected his equipment in his carry case. The other man had just finished examining all three horses for their yearly check-up, especially for Boots. The yearling had been gelded (1) last year and Steve was glad to see that he had recovered well.

"So, this wasn't planned?"

The former soldier shook his head. "We've done our best to keep Lieutenant and Tatiana away from each other during her heat periods. I guess we must have misjudged a day."

The vet chuckled. "Well, it only takes one. I've given her the vaccination against Rhinopneumonits (2) and I'll need to see her again a month or so before she foals and give her a few more vaccines. If she shows any signs of illness, injury or any other issue, please call me." Dr. Thames stood and held out a hand to Steve, which the soldier gladly shook.

"Thank you for coming out, Doctor."

"You're welcome, Mr. Rogers."

After the vet left, Steve headed back to the barn and walked over to Lieutenant's stall. He rubbed his forehead. "Why, again, did we adopt a fertile stallion and a fertile mare at the same time…?" He asked himself before looking up at said stallion. "You are one sneaky son of a gun, you know that right? You just had to go out and do the thing!"

Lieutenant huffed, shaking his mane like he was proud of himself.

"Now, don't get feisty with me, Mister." Steve scolded lightly, putting his hands on his hips like a disappointed parent. "We already get enough of that from Tatiana."

"Tell me about it..." A tired voice said from behind the blonde.

Steve turned to look. Natalia lead said Budyonny mare into her stall, confirmed that she had enough food and clean water, before closing the padlock. The red haired woman brushed off her hands and turned to her partner.

"So…What's the verdict?"

He kept his face blank. "It appears my _son_ has been sneaking out with your _daughter,_ Ma'am." He deadpanned.

Her green eyes widened, animatedly, before she clutched onto one of the posts next to Tatiana's stall to hold herself upright as she broke down, laughing.

Her laughter was contagious, and Steve soon found himself in stitches as he leaned against Lieutenant's stall.

"That…your face…" Nat gasped out, trying to catch her breath through the giggles. "I wish…I'd gotten…your face…on camera!"

A fresh wave of laughter swept through Steve and it took him several long minutes before he could compose himself. "Pesky teenagers…" He said, finally, rubbing the tears from his eyes.

"And here I thought _Boots_ would be the problem child." Natalia giggled, coming to sit by Steve. The former soldier soon joined her. "Guess I should have seen this coming…"

Steve shrugged. "So…now what?"

"Now what indeed, Mr. I-have-a-library-on-how-to-care-for-horses."

"Well…" the blonde rubbed the back of his neck. "Horse pregnancies are about a year in length, so you'll be able to ride her until about April, should all go well. Riding will be good exercise for her. She may need a more nutritious diet and a closer watch…" he bit his lip. "I guess the real question is, when the foal is born, will we want to keep it?"

Natalia thought about it for a long moment. "I'm assuming that financially we could, right?" At Steve's nod, she continued. "Well, Boots could use a companion, and our herd is rather small…maybe having another horse around would be a good idea."

The former soldier nodded. "Alright then." He stood and held out a hand to Nat. "I guess we better go tell Clint and Laura."

* * *

 _August_

"You know, you are very lucky, Tatiana." Natalia said as she held out a piece of apple to the mare from her seat under one of trees on the ranch property."

The pregnant mare sniffed the apple before taking it from her mistress' hand.

"You don't have many worries. You've got a roof over your head at night, fresh grass and feed, clean water every day, a gelding companion and a stallion who is protective of you, and now a baby on the way…"

The mare's ears twitched, indicating that her attention was divided between her mistress' words and the apple the redhead held in her hand.

"I can't have children," Natalia continued, deciding that she didn't want the rest of the apple and offered the remaining slices to Tatiana. "I've already told you this, and honestly, I thought I'd come to terms with that fact after Laura was pregnant with Nathaniel and after talking to Bruce about it…but it still nags me in the back of my mind. The one thing about my past that I just can't resolve."

The woman watched the mare for a long moment before running his fingers through her red locks. "Some days, I catch myself wondering if that's the kind of life Steve wants. A wife, kids, normalcy. He doesn't talk about it, but I see the way he is with Clint's kids…if there was one man on Earth who deserved that kind of life, its Steven G. Rogers."

The mare huffed, as if she agreed with that statement.

"But he's also incredibly stubborn," Natalia leaned against the tree, staring up at the still green leaves, and rolling her eyes. "He refused a lot of the dates I set him up with. I don't think he grasps the concept that you can't meet your 'right partner' if you don't get out there and look for her."

Tatiana lowered her head to graze, her ears on her mistress, indicating that she was listening.

The redhead closed her eyes and listened to the world around her. The wind blew comfortably by her ears, moving her long hair around her shoulders. It was comfortable out here. More comfortable than the thoughts that swarmed like hornets in her head. "Whoever this girl Steve's looking for is…she must be quite the Lady. And stupidly lucky."

The mare huffed once more, but didn't provide any additional commentary as she continued to graze.

* * *

 _Meanwhile, in the barn._

Steve was brushing down Lieutenant. "Nat and Tat have been gone for quite a while, huh." The former soldier said, brushing a particularly stubborn patch of dirt on the stallion's hind leg. "I'll bet they are at their tree."

The black stallion nickered in response.

"They'll be fine." The soldier reassured, though who he was trying to reassure was up for debate. "Has Nat been distant from you, too? For the past month, she's retreated into herself. I'm…I'm worried about her."

Lieutenant huffed.

"Now, now! I don't give you hell when you worry about Tat. I'm allowed to worry about my partner, too, ya know."

The stallion pawed at the ground twice with his right hoof.

"I'm not sure what to do about it." With a final swipe of the brush, Steve finished cleaning off the dirt. Setting down the brush on the table next to him, he picked up the comb beside it and began to work on the stallion's mane. "She told me once that she did ballet. It was part of her training, and apparently the theater in the next town over is having a showing of _Swan Lake_."

The horse's ears twitched.

"Maybe I should take her out. She doesn't go many places anymore…and I think we can spare one night away. After all," He patted the stallion's neck. "You can't cause more trouble beyond what you've gotten yourself into."

Lieutenant shook his mane, defiantly.

"That was _not_ a challenge, Lieutenant. It was a fact. There are no other mares around here for you to knock up, so stay put and take responsibility for your actions."

Another huff issued from the horse's nostrils, but he seemed to understand that statement, so Steve continued to work on a stubborn knot in the stallion's mane.

"I'll talk to Clint before booking some seats. Heaven knows I'm more likely to mess this 'going out' thing up." He frowned as the stubborn knot came loose. "Granted…this wouldn't count as a date…would it?"

Lieutenant stomped the ground twice once more.

"I'm gonna need to think this through…"

* * *

 _The Next Sunday_

One of the many things Clint enjoyed about living out here in the middle of nowhere was how clear the night sky was. Lila in particular loved to stargaze and was currently sprawled out on Steve and Nat's front lawn gazing up with her older brother at the different constellations.

Weekly dinners at the former Avengers' home had become routine of sorts shortly after they moved next door and Clint had a feeling that it wouldn't change anytime soon. Taking a swig of his after dinner beer, he sat back in one of the chairs on the porch and relaxed.

"Nice night out here," A voice interrupted his musings.

Clint smiled. "That's one of the joys of living out here, Steve," He addressed the other man. "Haven't you learned?"

Steve chuckled and sat in the chair next to the former archer, a beer also in his hand. "Even after five years, the beauty of the night still amazes me."

The father of the three raised his bottle before taking another swig of the brown liquid and the former soldier did the same. A comfortable silence filled the porch as the two men watched two of the youngest members of their little family point up at the stars and animatedly explain to each other what each constellation was.

"How's Tat been?" Clint asked after a long moment.

"She's been doing quite well. Nat's been riding her regularly and she's been well behaved." Steve replied without missing a beat. "Foal's not far along, so we don't know the gender just yet."

The archer nodded. "How's Nat been?"

The former soldier took another sip of his beer before replying. "Alright, I guess. When I see her, she says she's fine, but she spends a lot of time with Tatiana—more than she did before we found out Tat was pregnant—and honestly, I'm not entirely convinced."

Clint nodded once more. "She did the same thing when she found out that Laura was pregnant with Nathaniel."

Steve turned a bit to face his friend, and it wasn't hard to see the worry in the soldier's features.

The archer leaned forward. "You know that her… _graduation ceremony_ …" he practically spat the words, there was so much disgust in his voice. "Is the one thing from her past that she's very sure can't be reversed. She told me so years ago."

The soldier nodded, but didn't add any other details.

"With Nathaniel, she kind of tried to live vicariously through Laura. For the first few months, Nat rarely left her side, and then we got called to help with HYDRA…the point is," Clint interrupted himself. "Nat needs a distraction. She'll only spiral into some kind of depressive state from here."

The blonde pursed his lips at this. "I was actually gonna ask you about that. There's a showing of _Swan Lake_ next week in the next town over. Would that help distract her?"

Clint smiled. "I'm sure she'd enjoy it. Ballet was probably the one thing she enjoyed about her Red Room training." He pointed at the man beside him. "And _Swan Lake_ happens to be her favorite."

Steve couldn't help but smile and visibly relax. "Good. I'll book the tickets tonight."

"Don't plan on booking for Laura, the kids, and I," the archer added. "I'm taking them to Disney next week."

The blonde took another swig. "Well, I guess it'll just be dinner for two."

The archer kicked the other man's foot. "Are you finally asking her out?"

Steve lifted an eyebrow. "You _just said_ getting her out of the house was a good thing, Clint. I don't have any ulterior motive!"

"Uh-huh…right." Clint rolled his eyes. "I'll believe that when Banner asks Betty to marry him."

Steve laughed. "About that." He reached into his flannel shirt pocket and pulled out a piece of nice paper. "Take a look."

The archer did, and almost spat out his beer.

 _Elizabeth Ross and Robert Bruce Banner  
Request the Honour of your presence  
At their Marriage on…_

"Damn it…" Clint muttered. "Now I owe Stark twenty bucks… When did you get that?"

The Captain continued to laugh, sliding the invitation back into his pocket. "It was delivered today. I believe you got one, too. Laura might be holding onto it. But do I want to know what you two bet on?"

"Well…Nat _might_ kill me…"

Steve rolled his eyes, his face screaming _Really?_

"Hey! You two live out here for _five years_ and don't expect us to bet that _something's_ not going on between the two of you?"

"We are not having this conversation again." The soldier said, his tone final, and his stance suggesting he was going to get up in a moment.

But Clint was on a roll, and he wasn't going to stop now. "Actually, yes we are." Clint shoved the bigger man down back into his chair. "Steve, seriously, what the _hell_ is going on? Your eyes follow her every step like you're her devoted puppy, you rescued her from her past – kinda. She did a lot of heavy lifting, but you brought her out here and have made her happier than I've _ever_ seen her."

Steve gnashed his lip between his teeth, but didn't interrupt.

"Bruce told me about when she woke up in the hospital. About how you and Bruce were having a pretty deep conversation and then _Nat_ wakes up, and suddenly Bruce didn't exist. Nothing besides _her_ mattered in that moment, he said. And maybe I could believe that devoted friends or siblings may react in a similar fashion….but to ignore everyone else in the room?" His brown eyes bore into Steve's face. "Why not give the two of you a shot? Things are different now than they were three years ago…"

The soldier was silent for a long moment, and Clint could see the thoughts swirling in the other man's head. There were times where the other man was a hard read, but he generally left his heart on his sleeve. Right now, he was impassive, but Clint chalked that up to him being indecisive. He had spoken his piece and waited for the other man to respond.

" _Love is for children._ " Steve said slowly. "That's what she once said. And after everything we've been through…I don't want to lose _her_ because _I_ wanted to take a chance."

There was something missing at the end, but it wasn't hard to piece together, at least not for the former spy.

Clint had seen the man before him tear apart robots, aliens, and HYDRA operatives with ease, but when it came to women, the poor man struggled. And that struggle went deeper than just his reemergence from the ice after 70 years under. The skinny kid from Brooklyn had never been good with the ladies (" _No woman wants to dance with a man she might step on_.") and even after the serum, he had been too busy fighting in a war for romance, save for with Peggy Carter. But _even then_ time was cruel, and by the time he returned from the icy water for the dance he promised the foundress of S.H.I.E.L.D. it was too late.

Natalia Romanova had been the first woman Clint had seen the Super Soldier _not_ struggle with. And that had a lot to do with the fact that they were equals on the battlefield. She could take care of herself and he could as well. They trusted each other, even in New York. Clint had even seen that boost Steve had given Natalia all those years ago, and he was convinced that's when the attraction started (so much so that he had _money_ on it).

But things were different now, and the archer understood that. They were no longer fighting literally for their lives every day of the year. Rather, the two Avengers had settled down nicely out here and things were different. Change was in the air, and not just the change of seasons. Back when the barn collapsed, Clint had seen it. Natalia was no longer the terrified woman she had been when the two stumbled onto his porch in the middle of the night six years prior. And Steve was no longer the soldier that had half carried her up those steps.

They were _more_ than that.

And he _prayed_ that they would realize it.

"She might surprise you." Clint replied, taking the last swig of his beer.

The soldier did the same, chuckling lightly. "She usually does."

The archer began one last time. "Just ask, okay?"

* * *

 _Tuesday that same week_

Steve smiled at the tickets he held in his hands. He had managed to snag some really good seats for the showing of _Swan Lake_ on opening night and was quite pleased with himself.

Now, to share the news with Natalia.

That thought alone sent Steve's gut into the floor beneath him.

It was around ten in the morning and, true to the last month's routine, Nat was nowhere to be found in the house and barn. But that wasn't a problem Steve hadn't planned for.

Around eleven, the rancher saddled up Lieutenant, a backpack slung over his shoulders and a hat on his head to keep the glare out of his eyes as he rode.

It didn't take that long for the black stallion and the rancher to find the Budyonny and the red haired woman, as they both were under their favorite apple tree. The mare grazed nearby while the woman leaned against the bark of the tree, looking up at the blue sky. She didn't turn to look as Steve rode up towards them, though the rancher was pretty sure the former spy knew of their arrival. The mare, on the other hand, acknowledged their presence with a raise of her brown head.

The rancher dismounted and took off Lieutenant's saddle and bridle to allow the stallion to graze beside the mare. He patted Tatiana's neck in greeting before approaching her mistress.

"Is this spot taken, ma'am?" He asked, drawing her green-gray eyes towards him. A smile widened on his face as she rolled her eyes, a gesture so typical of Natalia.

 _And he loved these little things about her._

"It's your ranch, cowboy," She replied, but did turn a bit so he could join her in the tree's shade.

"It's yours, too." He countered, sitting beside her and taking off his backpack and hat. "Weather's been nice out here?"

"Yes," Her green eyes eyed him and he did his best to not let her know just how nervous about this he was. He really did enjoy being with her, and tried his best to make sure that was the only vibe she could read off of him. Especially since he wanted her to be at ease with him. "So, what brings you out this way this afternoon?"

"Lunch, actually." Steve reached into the backpack and pulled out two nicely wrapped packages. He held out one towards her. "Shwarma."

She chuckled, relaxing slightly, and took the Arabian sandwich wrap from him. "Been a while since we enjoyed one of these."

"It was an Avenger's standard. Join the team? Shwarma. Rough battle? Shwarma."

"Tony blow up half of Avenger's Tower? Shwarma."

Steve outright laughed at that. And Nat chuckled some more at her own joke before taking a bite of her wrap. The former soldier soon followed suit. They ate in silence until Steve spoke up.

"I can see why you come out here every day," He observed, his blue eyes gazing across the expanse of grass and trees. "It's very peaceful."

She shoved him lightly. "Isn't that why we came out here in the first place?"

His smile didn't wane at that and his gaze turned back to her. "Something like that. I guess it's just taken me a while to truly appreciate it."

Nat chuckled, a soft sound that Steve would have loved to listen to all day. "Men…never seeing what's really in front of them…" She muttered jokingly to herself.

"Well, we are usually distracted by a million tasks." Steve countered, taking another bite of his wrap.

The redhead rolled her eyes. "Only when nagged to do them."

"Though, we do _do_ things without being nagged…sometimes when we are trying to impress someone."

The words just tumbled out of his mouth, and he could feel his gut clench when she stiffened slightly.

"Oh really, now?" She asked, turning her green eyed gaze back to him, her gaze curious and searching.

The former soldier fought back swallowing hard or coughing lightly and settled on taking another bite of his wrap. "Yeah. Have you seen the things young men pull when they are trying to impress the woman of their affection? Write songs, make something, do something to impress them…It seems that men, generally speaking, need a woman to motivate them."

"You've been watching YouTube again, haven't you?"

Steve rolled his eyes. "Yes, but that's not the point."

"Then what is, because I'm curious. Have you found someone to impress?"

If he had been Bucky, he probably would have said yes and proceeded to tell her everything he's done to impress her.

If he had been Tony, he probably would have just kissed her and been done with it.

But he is Steven Grant Rogers, and there had only been one other woman who had made him feel like the skinny kid from Brooklyn while he possessed the perfectly healthy body that the serum had given him. And frankly, he had never gotten this far with Peggy, because the ice had gotten in the way.

But there was no ice. No plane to crash. No world to save.

It was just Steve and Natalia.

His silence must have spoken volumes to Natalia, as a frown formed between her brows. "What did you do, Steve?"

"I…um…" _Damn,_ he thought. _My accent!_ He took a deep breath, trying to compose himself. "There's a showing of _Swan Lake_ next week in the next town over. And I was wondering…would you like to go… _with me?_ " The last two words were barely a whisper and he wished he could have pulled them back in. He hadn't intended to say those last words, but they had spilled out.

And now there was no going back.

And her gaze freaking him out.

She was silent for a long moment, her face turned to stone and for a moment he wasn't sure if she was even _breathing_ , only adding to Steve's anxiety as he struggled internally.

Should he say something else? Should he qualify that it _didn't have_ to be _and wasn't_ a date?

As the silence continued, Steve wished the Earth beneath him would swallow him whole then and there. His tongue refusing to cooperate to just _say something else_.

All he could do was stare at Natalia's frighteningly blank face.

* * *

Natalia was practically frozen to the spot. The Widow's mask that she had long discarded in Steve's presence taking over her face.

While behind her grey green eyes, analysis and studying was going on.

She mulled over his words several times, taking notice of every little flux in his speech, the shifting of his eyes, his quirks that she had learned (studied) so well.

She had noticed his anxiety the moment he arrived, though he did his hardest to hide it behind a desire to be near her and to enjoy the day with her (which was probably a real thing for him, as he didn't lie, even in his body language). But the whole visit had smelt of something off. Steve had only actively searched for her twice since she started making these daily trips to the apple tree – and she had chosen this spot solely because she knew he wouldn't worry if he knew where she was. Both of those times that he had visited her, he had brought food, but he had never really joined her as he had other chores to attend to that day or they had both gone back to the house as Nathaniel was coming over that night.

But now the man had shown her is hand…and there was something different there.

Although Steve had been an easy read when it came to his weak attempts to lie or his bounding honesty, the one thing _she_ had struggled with to find was where his heart was. Some days she convinced herself that it would always be with Peggy, and maybe she was right to a certain extent. But after the Foundress of S.H.I.E.L.D. had passed away and Steve had grieved for her, his heart seemed to be placed on the back burner – which wasn't surprising as that was in the midst of the Avengers Civil War.

Then Steve had asked her to run away with him and when she had asked about Sharon, he had simply stated that it hadn't worked out between the two of them. And although Natalia was curious as to what had happened, she never asked. Broken or damaged hearts were something she understood well, and if Steve didn't want to provide any details, she wasn't going to force them out of him.

 _What could be the harm in going to dinner and a show with Steve? He won't do anything to hurt me or go any farther than I'll let him or he'll let himself. He is a gentleman after all. And it probably isn't a date anyway, he just didn't know how to ask._

She wasn't sure how many heartbeats had gone by before she remembered how to breathe again. And by then she was taking in Steve's poor facial expression.

The poor man looked so pale and out of his element, almost as if he wished he could disappear. Rarely had she ever seen the "skinny kid from Brooklyn" behind the Super Soldier, but here he was, sitting before her. Almost waiting for her to reject him.

"Sure," She said finally, adding a smile to her face and eyes. As apprehensive as she was about this, Natalia was pretty sure this wasn't exactly a date and more of a way to get her out of the house. She had seen Steve's eyes trailing her for weeks now, doing his best to hide the worry that filled his blue eyes. "When is it?"

He visibly relaxed at her reply and looked like he remembered how to breathe once more. "Opening night is next Friday. The show is at nine in the evening."

Plenty of time to prepare. "Wonderful. So what will you be wearing?"

Steve laughed and the anxiety from before was gone.

 _Maybe this wouldn't be so bad after all…_

* * *

 **And there you have it! Part One of Battleship!**

 **As soon as I have part 2 ready, I'll post it.**

 **Thanks again to all of you for your patience. I really appreciate it. If you have a minute, please let me know what you thought of this chapter with a review!**

~Rachel


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